it's the thought that counts...really it is.

damn the zoos!!!!!!!

"lucky" elephant...

i'm against zoos.

a very sad story out of the calgary zoo today. a baby asian elephant, about a week old, died yesterday from an infection. its mother had rejected it after giving birth, probably denying it of critical antibodies found in it's mother's milk.

why am i against zoos? in cases like this where breeding programs result in rejection of offspring. the elephant keeper at the zoo professed that "she's [the mother elephant] never had a baby before, never seen a baby before, doesn't know what it is," said [the keeper]. "When this baby came out of her, she had no idea what this big thing was that dropped out of her and she was very afraid."

do rejections occur in the "real" world? more than likely i guess. i'm not sure of the statistics or of any such studies though. however, according to carol buckley of "elephant sanctuary", a "naturalistic sanctuary" in tennessee, "in the wild, female elephants live in extended matriarchal herds. There's a lot of knowledge passed down from individual to individual. Many elephants are able to help in the whole rearing and birthing process. In captivity we don't have those situations."

the argument that this event would not have happened in the "real" world because of habitat destruction and other human transgressions still doesn't justify having captive animals.

extinction of species (elephants and homo sapiens included) throughout evolutionary history is inevitable. conversely, new speciation events occur simultaneously and fill niches left by elephants. it sounds harsh but it's enough justification to discontinue zoos.

there is hope out there. i've seen excellent examples of conservation in east africa. until recently, there was chain of 13 new national parks created in gabon in west africa. inspired by michael fay, of national geographic fame, these parks encompass 11 percent of gabon's landmass.

having cited these examples, worldwide conservation of critical ecosystems is pathetic at best. the best case scenario is that we could preserve vast tracts of land, saving valuable features such as migration routes (eg. the yellowstone to yukon project with regards to grizzly bear migration). the worse case scenario is the preservation of isolated tracts or "islands" of habitat (eg. national parks).

either way, we should focus our efforts on conservation of habitat rather than using zoos as "genetic holding pens".

as for education, zoos are inexcusable proxies for the real thing. there is such a gaping disconnect between people and "nature" these days. just go out and witness "nature" for yourself whether that's in our own backyard or africa.

when i heard of the baby elephant's death, i had mixed feelings. i was sad at first. but then i was happy for it just because it wouldn't have to spend anymore time in a zoo.

digitally enhanced grilled cheese sandwich...

digitally enhanced image...

muzak pick-me-up

so, you're having a bad day or need a muzakical interlude...

i suggest this muzakical treat:

click here.

now crank up the volume. enjoy.

kenny goes down in flames...

jeopardy category: business & industry

the answer: most of this firm's 70,000 seasonal white-collar employees work only four months a year.

gotta love it...

you've got to love this hockey strike.


the flower

tsn has been showing classic hockey games that certainly exceed 99 percent of any games played today. tonight was the 7th game of the 1979 semi-finals, montreal vs. boston, better known as the don cherry meltdown bowl.

the bruins, with 4 minutes left to play in the 3rd period, scored to break a 3-3 tie. i thought it was over, done, kaput. a minute later, the bruins choked and took one of the most infamous penalties (one that would chase cherry from boston) ever: too many men on the ice. at 18:46, guy lafleur took a beautiful jacques lemaire drop pass (god, he was beautiful) and blasted, from the top of the right face off circle, the puck past bruins goalie gil gilbert to tie the game.

ivan lambert would score the winning goal in a thrilling overtime.

the canadiens would go on to beat the ny rangers in the finals, winning their 4th straight stanley cup championship.

unfortunately, 1979 proved to be the end of an era. for the canadiens, there wouldn't be a drive for five. the new york islanders would be the next dynasty. the canadiens wouldn't win the cup again till 1986, riding the coat tails of a rookie goaltender named patrick roy.

it was so nice hearing danny gallivan (god rest his soul) and dick irvin doing the play by play. no one else has come close to danny doing play by play since. the old forum looked magnificent. seeing the old scoreboard brought tears to my eyes. look mum, no jumbotron.

man, i don't think there's ever been a great a team as the 1979 canadiens. names like lafleur (god he was a beautiful hockey player - so dominant), shutt, lemaire, savard, lapointe, robinson, houle, tremblay, lambert, gainey, risebrough, dryden, and scotty on the bench. never again, my friends...

the national basketbrawl association...

well, if you don't know about the debacle that occurred in detroit yet, you probably think there are nhl games being played right now. funny thing is, during the detroit/indianapolis kerfuffle, the 9/11 operators in detroit were receiving calls from fans reporting the brawl. "there's a fight going on. send the police NOW!!!!" yep...that would be my exact response as well. let's phone 9/11... it was as if they've never seen a fight at a basketball game before.

so, therein lies the difference between basketball and hockey fans. the reaction of hockey fans? meh... relax, man. grab another brewskie.

wally buono

i love wally buono. good luck with the by-pass operation. hope you're back at it soon. (no wally, it's not a routine operation. anytime they crack open your chest and expose you like a rack o' lamb, it's serious stuff). my dad had the same operation. he was very brave...

ebay here i come...i'm gonna be rich!!!!!

so, i made my favourite sandwich for lunch the other day: the grilled cheese. lo and behold, it was so obvious. a miracle!!! an image appeared on the delectable toasty surface of the sandwich right before my eyes. omigod, i nearly drowned when a gulp of milk went down the wrong tube...

i'll give you a chance to suss out the image first!!!

democracy rules the day...

well, it's 20:36 and the cbc's declared a ralphie majority government. i'm not sure what took them so long. watching the tv coverage has been somewhat amusing. it's like watching a football game with a lopsided score and the commentators desparately trying to make it interesting for the remaining viewers.

the score is 27 pc seats to 1 for the liberals. joe, the poli sci prof., to jane, the news anchor, "jane, i think we're finally seeing a trend in the numbers... ralphie's squirming in his seat now, eh".

it's 45 pc seats to 16 for the rest of them. ndp pundits says, "obviously there's massive discontent with the ralphie's government."

zzzzzzzz....

i voted today at around 4 pm. the school i voted at is on my running route. so, it's quite convenient for me to just drop in. this is the third time i've "exercised" the ol' franchise this year. i actually recognised some of the workers. they called me mr. bubba. holy crap. they're used to having me drip perspiration all over the place particularly the ballots. i'm clean, eh. no probs.

strangely, i had to wait in line to register. ok, there was one guy in front of me. but the wait wasn't fun especially when the tiny strip of toilet paper i brought along to wipe my head was becoming saturated with sweat. [aside: as a cost cutting measure, the catholic school board ought to turn down the ambient temperature in their schools. i bet alot of their students nod off during class because of the heat.]

i quickly voted, handed in my soggy ballots, and got the hell out.

i voted for the green party. the green party guy looked like a dufus on his website, but i'm not exactly a beauty queen myself, eh. i like to think i'm above looks when it comes to voting. i hope you don't vote for beautiful people just for the sake of voting for a flaky thing like beauty. we all end up looking like raisons eventually, eh.

why the green party? it's always interesting to see a single digit vote count on the tv screen for the candidate you voted for and to think, "one of those votes is mine. i made a difference."

that's democracy my friends...

they gave me a second ballot. i was confused. it was for chosing senators. what the hell? i didn't know we could do that. wahooooo! more voting!!!!! i didn't know who the hell any the candidates were but give me a pencil and maybe i'll work a miracle. first, i picked all female names. ok, that's 1 out of the lot. hey, i vaguely remember one of the candidates being an ex-stamps player. ok, he's in... no green party, ndp, or liberal people? crap. this process was giving me a brain cramp. i gave up and handed it in...

that's not democracy my friends...

god bless all those people, especially right-wing conservative evangelicals, who voted.

we have fulfilled our promise to all peoples who died in all wars in the name of canada. they did not die in vain...

tomorrow is another day. it was a divisive campaign but all albertans must unite behind ralphie. we shall overcome... america, sorry that's alberta, is strong.

god bless ralphie!

election 2004 wrap up

as of 23:00h, the score was pc's 61 seats, liberals 17, ndp with 4.

how do you win 61 of 83 seats with only 47 percent of the popular vote? i dunnit get it...

note: geologist guy next door is celebrating by doing doughnuts on the street with his suv. sore winner, eh...?

the first step's a doozie, eh...

"touching the void" by joe simpson.

in 1985, joe simpson and climbing partner, simon yates, had reached the top of siula grande, a previously unclimbed 21000 ft peruvian peak. the weather changed for the worse on the descent. a storm rolled in, enveloping the climbers in a white out. simpson would break his leg in a fall. yates was charged with the mindboggling, near impossible task of lowering, rope length by rope length, his friend down the mountain. unknowingly and unfortunately, yates would later lower simpson into a gigantic crevasse. after holding the rope for hours, yates thought his friend was dead. he decided to cut the rope...

i don't want to give away the rest of the film. suffice to say, simpson went on to write his book "touching the void" detailing his harrowing experiences on the mountain. that book was made into a docu-drama that was shown on pbs tonight. "touching the void" was an incredible film. outstanding re-enactments interwoven with compelling on-camera interviews with simpson and yates recollecting events and reactions nearly 20 years ago resulted in an amazing film.

i was just riveted to the tv screen.

it should be on pbs a couple more times this week. watch it or get the book.

grey cup wrap up.

i love wally buono. i was so happy when he got the hell out of town. i know how it is to work under incompetent and overbearing management and fully understood his move even if it was to the lions.

with all that, i couldn't get myself to cheer for his team tonight (even though it was comprised of alot of ex-stamps as well). i like dave dickenson alot. he's a good quarterback. until he wins the grey cup, he won't be great.

they'll be back next year...unfortunately.

one more prediction...

it'd be lame to predict the victor of tomorrow's provincial election. but i will predict that ralphie will not serve out the 3.75 years that he promised. instead, i predict that he will quit in 1.5 to 2 years time. he will preside over the centennial next year then quit or be pushed out by battling replacement candidates (chretien/martin-style).

otherwise, please vote!!!!

want fries with that...

a little ketchep and you got yourself a bloody mary...

amazing race 6...

ATTENTION MIKE: DO NOT READ THE FOLLOWING BLOG ENTRY. I REPEAT. DO NOT READ THE FOLLOWING BLOG ENTRY. BUT READ THE ENTRY BELOW THIS ONE THOUGH.

5 vital skills required for amazing race success.

1) know what kind of gas your car takes.
2) know how to read a map.
3) bring a compass and know how to use it.
4) be able to walk without losing your breath.
5) know how to drive a stick.

notes from episode 1:

1) many couples believe that screaming obscenities at one another is a normal form of communication.
2) many icelandic people can be found out in the middle of nowhere, at road’s edge, willing to help out obnoxious americans in english.
3) everyone in iceland is drunk.
4) of all the seasons so far, this group is the most incompetent of seen.
5) there aren’t any speed limits in iceland.

initial impressions:

hell boy/rebecca – (ex-daters). must learn that the word diesel on an icelandic car means the same in english. hopeless. will eventually kill each other (WEKEO)

lena/kristy – (sisters). hot mormon chicks. i hope they’re in it for the duration.

avi/joe – token goofy jewish buddy team. incompetent. hopeless.

gus/ hera – token father/daughter team. who the hell would want to drag their old man half way around the world? hopeless. gotta love her name though.

bolo/lori – token freak team (wrasslers). should spend more time focused on the race rather than wrasslin’ one another. otherwise, 1! 2! 3! you’re outta there…(WEKEO)

kendra/freddy, kris/jon - very beautiful people, indistinguishable so far.

jonathan/victoria (uber-idiot/passive wife). jonathan’s this season’s “colin”. top 3 finishers… just because he’s an idiot. (WEKEO)

hayden/aaron (dating actors) - young, restless (aren’t we all?), smart. top 3.

don/mary jean (token old folks) – did well in physical challenges but way too decrepit…

meredith/maria (best friends) - wow, that sure was a pretty waterfall… totally hopeless.

quote of the show

"suck out the gas? the whole tank? ...with my mouth?"

son of blah...

more disturbing news:

ralphie klein has promised a ministry of re-structuring. now there's a vision. let's throw a big ol' whoop-dee-doo, eh... another layer of bureaucracy. re-structuring? pfft. that's so 90's.

ralphie goes on to say, "I was going to do it [the re-structuring] before the election, but I decided that perhaps it would be too politically controversial [bubba's note: i can't remember alberta politics close to being this exciting... ooooohhhh, controversy...] , and it's not a good time [bubba's note: can't think of a better time than this...] to shift and move cabinet positions prior to an election, so we'll leave it until after," Klein said. "It may result in nothing at all happening, because I might not be re-elected, who knows. [bubba's note: gee ralphie, the anticipation of your defeat is killin' me. zzzzzzzz...]"

ralphie says he will "ask" albertans what they want in terms of a healthcare plan. that is, after the current election. for starters, how bout letting us elect officials for the various health regions. too bad that idea cuts too close to chain of command that ends with ralphie. too much resistance to the "wishes" of albertans.

ralphie is toying with the idea of holding a referendum on post-election heathcare reforms. why doesn't he just spill his guts about his plans and use them as centrepiece in his platform? treat the election as the ultimate referendum. hey, that's the ticket... save us some money as well.

further on the topic of healthcare privatization, ralphie says his "My main concern is to make sure that people who suffer afflictions get treatment. My primary concern is does Martha and Henry . . . or Mr. and Mrs. Grundy get his or her hip replaced?" in the next breath ralphie extolls the calgary health region for contracting out 500 such surgeries to his crony friends at the privately-owned health resource centre (formerly the holy cross hospital).

each hip operation will cost the authority an extra 10 percent on top of the what it costs normally. according to ralphie this solution may turn out to be cheaper if the cost of building more public hospitals and operating theatres is considered. he should have told us this before he blow'd up the general hospital and sold off the holy cross...

condeleeza rice is to be the next secretary of state. this only confirms my theory that a having a Ph.D. has nothing to do with one's intellectual abilities.

i saw someone putting up their xmas lights last weekend. egads.

saskatchewan kicker paul mccallum missed a critical field goal in last weekend's western conference cfl final. back home in regina, a disgruntled riders fan backed his/her truck onto mccallum's property and dumped a load of assorted manure on the lawn. the regina police cordoned off the area to catch the culprit. an unidentified officer likened the search, for the manics of manure, to shouting the name "tony" in a catholic high school.

enough of blah...

i was riding my bike home from the liberry yesterday. unbeknowst to me, my wallet dropped out of my pocket. 20 minutes after i get home, some guy comes to door with my wallet. apparently, it and the contents were scattered all over the road in front of his house. thanks to him and all decent peoples on earth.

the sucker...

who loves ya baby?

i remember...

i remember:

when i had a better memory.

when doctors still made house calls.

jane.

the last time the loonie was worth more than the green back.

the 8 track tape player.

when tv's used tubes.

haight-ashbury.

ed sullivan.

milk delivery.

mao.

willie burden.

when dubble bubble gum was a penny a piece.

steve smith scoring "the goal" that ended the "drive for five".

i was eating a bowl of froot loops when the second plane hit the world trade centre.

when tv was still b & w.

i was eating a ham sandwich on curry barracks firing range when wayne gretzky was traded to the LA kings.

being in line waiting to see star trek: the movie at the chinook theatre.

dean martin.

sammy davis, jr.

when bob barker had "black" hair.

a really bad game show called "definition".

wayne & schuster.

howie meeker.

don messer.

when 7-11 actually opened 7-11.

rc cola.

fresca.

tab.

typewriters.

our single floppy drive computer with 64 Kb of RAM.

the commodore 64.

george baines.

mrs. woodwards.

pong.

getting sick from eating a hotdog that had been lying for 3 days on our basement floor in grade 9.

my first cash transaction at my dad's store. i was 10 years old. a guy bought a jug of milk with a hundred dollar bill. bastard.

a village of namibians watching me chug down 2 litres of pepsi.

watching the 2002 gold medal hockey game at work. thanks dave hooper.

the indian/chinese/aussie girl i met in nepal.

hanne.

public service announcement

the wetlands



Wetlands are amazing things. They filter phosphorous (found in cleaners) and
nitrates (found in fertilizers). They hold water during drought, and the
wetland water evaporates which will most likely cause it to rain. During
floods, they act like sponges and soak up excess water.

But there is a problem. As cities are expanding, we are taking up room and
filling wetlands. Farmeres as well are filling them in to make more room for
their farms. Wetlands provide many homes for animals. Many animals rely on
wetlands. Wetlands need our help! Visit www.ducks.ca

brought to you by a lover of the wetlands...

sorry don't mean a thang...

source: www.sorryeverybody.com

hope none of these folks are related to you...

Cpl. Roberto Abad, Sgt. Michael D. Acklin II, Spc. Genaro Acosta, Pfc. Steven Acosta, Capt. James F. Adamouski, Pvt. Algernon Adams, Sgt. Brandon E. Adams, Spc. Clarence Adams III, 1st Lt. Michael R. Adams, Pfc. Michael S. Adams, Lt. Thomas Mullen Adams, Spc. Jamaal R. Addison, Lance Cpl. Patrick R. Adle, Capt. Tristan N. Aitken, Spc. Segun Frederick Akintade, Lance Cpl. Nickalous N. Aldrich, Spc. Ronald D. Allen Jr., Sgt. Glenn R. Allison, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Allred, Capt. Eric L. Allton, Cpl. Nicanor Alvarez, Cpl. Daniel R. Amaya, Pfc. John D. Amos II, Lance Cpl. Brian E. Anderson, Airman 1st Class Carl L. Anderson Jr., Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael C. Anderson, Spc. Michael Andrade, Pfc, Spc. Yoe M. Aneiros, Lance Cpl. Levi T. Angell, Army Spc. Edward J. Anguiano, Chief Warrant Officer Andrew Todd Arnold, Lance Cpl. Alexander S. Arredondo, Spc. Richard Arriaga, Staff Sgt. Jimmy J. Arroyave, Spc. Robert R. Arsiaga, Sgt. Evan Asa Ashcraft, Pfc. Shawn M. Atkins, Maj. Jay Aubin, Capt. Matthew J. August, Lance Cpl. Aaron C. Austin, Spc. Tyanna S. Avery-Fedder, Lance Cpl. Andrew Julian Aviles, Pfc. Eric A. Ayon, Sgt. 1st Class Henry A. Bacon, Sgt. Andrew Joseph Baddick, Staff Sgt. Daniel A. Bader, Staff Sgt. Nathan J. Bailey, Spc. Ronald W. Baker, Spc. Ryan T. Baker, Sgt. Sherwood R. Baker.

Pfc. Chad E. Bales, 1st Lt. Kenneth Michael Ballard, Maj. Spc. Solomon C. Bangayan, Lt. Col. Dominic R. Baragona, Pfc. Mark A. Barbret, Pfc. Collier E. Barcus, Sgt. Michael C. Barkey, Spc. Jonathan P. Barnes, Command Sgt. Maj. Edward C. Barnhill, Lance Cpl. Aric J. Barr, Sgt. Michael Paul Barrera, Maj. Carlos Barro Ollero, Sgt. Douglas E. Bascom, Spc. Todd M. Bates, Sgt. 1st Class Michael Battles Sr., Gunnery Sgt. Ronald E. Baum, Spc. Alan N. Bean Jr., Spc. Bradley S. Beard, Spc. Beau R. Beaulieu, Capt. Ryan Beaupre, Spc. James L. Beckstrand, Sgt. Gregory A. Belanger, Cpl. Christopher Belchik, Sgt. Aubrey D. Bell, Pfc. Wilfred D. Bellard, Staff Sgt. Joseph P. Bellavia, Sgt. 1st Class William M. Bennett, Spc. Robert T. Benson, 1st Lt. David R. Bernstein, Spc. Joel L. Bertoldie, Staff Sgt. Stephen A. Bertolino Sr., Staff Sgt. Marvin Best, Cpl. Mark A. Bibby, Sgt. Benjamin W. Biskie, Sgt. Michael E. Bitz, Sgt. Jarrod W. Black, Chief Warrant Officer Michael T. Blaise, Capt. Ernesto M. Blanco, Command Sgt. Maj. James D. Blankenbecler, Spc. Joseph M. Blickenstaff, Spc. Nicholas H. Blodgett, Sgt. Trevor A. Blumberg, Lance Cpl. Jeremy L. Bohlman, Gunnery Sgt. Jeffrey E. Bohr Jr., Lance Cpl. Todd J. Bolding, Sgt. Dennis J. Boles, Sgt. 1st Class Craig A. Boling, Petty Officer 3rd Class Doyle W. Bollinger Jr, Sgt. 1st Class Kelly Bolor, Staff Sgt. Stevon A. Booker.

Chief Warrant Officer Clarence E. Boone, Capt. John J. Boria, Pfc. Rachel K. Bosveld, Spc. Mathew G. Boule, Staff Sgt. Elvis Bourdon, Pvt. 1st Class Samuel R. Bowen, Staff Sgt. Hesley Box Jr., Pvt. Noah L. Boye, Lance Cpl. Aaron Boyles, Spc. Edward W. Brabazon, Cpl. Travis J. Bradach-Nall, Staff Sgt. Kenneth R. Bradley, Staff Sgt. Stacey C. Brandon, Spc. Artimus D. Brassfield, Pfc. Joel K. Brattain, Pfc. Jeffrey F. Braun, Chief Warrant Officer William I. Brennan, Staff Sgt. Steven H. Bridges, Spc. Kyle A. Brinlee, Staff Sgt. Cory W. Brooks, Sgt. Thomas F. Broomhead, Sgt. Andrew W. Brown, Tech. Sgt. Bruce E. Brown, Lance Cpl. Dominic C. Brown, Cpl. Henry L. Brown, Pfc. John E. Brown, Spc. Larry K. Brown, Spc. Lunsford B. Brown II, 1st Lt. Tyler H. Brown, Spc. Philip D. Brown, Pfc. Timmy R. Brown Jr., 1st Lt. Tyler H. Brown, Cpl. Andrew D. Brownfield, Petty Officer 3rd Class Nathan B. Bruckenthal, Lance Cpl. Cedric E. Bruns, 2nd Lt. Todd J. Bryant, Sgt. Ernest G. Bucklew, Spc. Roy Russell Buckley, Pfc. Paul J. Bueche, Lt. Col. Charles H. Buehring, Lance Cpl. Brian Rory Buesing, Sgt. George Edward Buggs, Spc. Joshua I. Bunch, Staff Sgt. Christopher Bunda, Staff Sgt. Michael L. Burbank, Staff Sgt. Richard A. Burdick, Spc. Alan J. Burgess, Lance Cpl. Jeffrey C. Burgess, Pfc. Tamario D. Burkett, Sgt. Travis L. Burkhardt.

Pfc. David P. Burridge, Pfc. Jesse R. Buryj, Pfc. Charles E. Bush Jr., Pvt. Matthew D. Bush, Pfc. Damian S. Bushart, Sgt. Jacob L. Butler, Capt. Joshua T. Byers, Cpl. Juan C. Cabralbanuelos, Pfc. Cody S. Calavan, Sgt. Juan Calderon Jr, Sgt. Charles T. Caldwell, Spc. Nathaniel A. Caldwell, Staff Sgt. Joseph Camara, Spc. Michael C. Campbell, Sgt. Ryan M. Campbell, Spc. Marvin A. Camposiles, Spc. Isaac Campoy, Spc. Ervin Caradine Jr., Spc. Adolfo C. Carballo, Pfc. Michael M. Carey, Cpl. Richard P. Carl, Pfc. Ryan G. Carlock, Pfc. Benjamin R. Carman, Staff Sgt. Edward W. Carmen, Spc. Jocelyn L. Carrasquillo, Sgt. Frank T. Carvill, Capt. Christopher S. Cash, Spc. Ahmed A. Cason, Pfc. Jose Casanova, Lance Cpl. James A. Casper, Capt. Paul J. Cassidy, Staff Sgt. Roland L. Castro, Sgt. Sean K. Cataudella, Lance Cpl. Steven C. T. Cates, Pfc. Thomas D. Caughman, Staff Sgt. James W. Cawley, Spc. Jessica L. Cawvey, Petty Officer 3rd Class David A. Cedergren, Lance Cpl. Manuel A. Ceniceros, Cpl. Kemaphoom A. Chanawongse, Spc. James A. Chance III, Staff Sgt. William D. Chaney, Chief Warrant Officer Robert William Channell Jr., Spc. Jason K. Chappell, Pfc. Jonathan M. Cheatham, Sgt. Yohjyh L. Chen, Lance Cpl. Marcus M. Cherry, 2nd Lt. Therrel S. Childers, Spc. Andrew F. Chris.

Staff Sgt. Thomas W. Christensen, Spc. Brett T. Christian, Spc. Arron R. Clark, Staff Sgt. Michael J. Clark, Lance Cpl. Donald J. Cline Jr., Pfc. Christopher R. Cobb, Lance Cpl. Kyle W. Codner, 1st Sgt. Christopher D. Coffin, Pvt. Bradli N. Coleman, Cpl. Gary B. Coleman, 2nd Lt. Benjamin J. Colgan, Sgt. Russell L. Collier, Sgt. 1st Class Gary L. Collins, Lance Cpl. Jonathan W. Collins, Chief Warrant Officer Lawrence S. Colton, Spc. Zeferino E. Colunga, Sgt. Robert E. Colvill, Sgt. Kenneth Conde Jr., Sgt. Timothy M. Conneway, Spc. Steven D. Conover, Capt. Aaron J. Contreras, Lance Cpl. Pedro Contreras, Sgt. Jason Cook, Command Sgt. Major Eric F. Cooke, Sgt. Dennis A. Corral, Chief Warrant Officer Alexander S. Coulter, 2nd Lt. Leonard M. Cowherd, Spc. Gregory A. Cox, Pfc. Ryan R. Cox, Lance Corporal Timothy R. Creager, Sgt. Michael T. Crockett, Staff Sgt. Ricky L. Crockett, Sgt. Brud J. Cronkrite, Lance Cpl. Kyle D. Crowley, Pvt. Rey D. Cuervo, Pfc. Kevin A. Cuming, Spc. Daniel Francis J. Cunningham, Staff Sgt. Darren J. Cunningham, Spc. Carl F. Curran, Cpl. Michael Edward Curtin, Staff Sgt. Christopher E. Cutchall, Pfc. Brian K. Cutter, Pfc. Anthony D. D'Agostino, Spc. Edgar P. Daclan Jr., Capt. Nathan S. Dalley, Lance Cpl. Andrew S. Dang, Spc. Danny B. Daniels II, Pvt. 1st Class Torey J. Dantzler, Pfc. Norman Darling, Capt. Eric B. Das.

Spc. Shawn M. Davies, Pvt. Brandon L. Davis, Staff Sgt. Craig Davis, Staff Sgt. Donald N. Davis, Spc. Raphael S. Davis, Staff Sgt. Wilbert Davis, Staff Sgt. Jeffrey F. Dayton, Pvt. Jason L. Deibler, Spc. Lauro G. DeLeon Jr., Sgt. Felix M. Delgreco, Sgt. Jacob H. Demand, Staff Sgt. Mike A. Dennie, Spc. Darryl T. Dent, Pfc. Ervin Dervishi, Spc. Daniel A. Desens, Pfc. Michael R. Deuel, Pvt. Michael J. Deutsch, Petty Officer 3rd Class Christopher M. Dickerson, Cpl. Nicholas J. Dieruf, Spc. Jeremiah J. DiGiovanni, Spc. Jeremy M. Dimaranan, Spc. Michael A. Diraimondo, Spc. Anthony J. Dixon, Spc. Ryan E. Doltz, Sgt. Michael E. Dooley, Chief Warrant Officer Patrick D. Dorff, Petty Officer 2nd Class Trace W. Dossett, Lance Cpl. Scott E. Dougherty, 1st Sgt. Robert J. Dowdy, Pfc. Stephen P. Downing II, Spc. Chad H. Drake, Pvt. Jeremy L. Drexler, Cpl. Jason L. Dunham, Staff Sgt. Joe L. Dunigan Jr., Spc. Robert L. DuSang, Spc. William D. Dusenbery, 2nd Lt. Seth J. Dvorin, Petty Officer 2nd Class Jason B. Dwelley, Pfc. Sheldon R. Hawk Eagle, Staff Sgt. Richard S. Eaton Jr., Cpl. Christopher S. Ebert, Sgt. William C. Eckhart, Spc. Marshall L. Edgerton, Pfc. Shawn C. Edwards, Spc. Andrew C. Ehrlich, Sgt. Aaron C. Elandt, Spc. William R. Emanuel IV, Lance Cpl. Mark E. Engel, Spc. Peter G. Enos, Senior Airman Pedro I. Espaillat Jr.

Pfc. Analaura Esparza Gutierrez, Sgt. Adam W. Estep, Pvt. Ruben Estrella-Soto, Pfc. David Evans, Cpl. Mark A. Evnin, Pfc. Jeremy Ricardo Ewing, Sgt. Justin L. Eyerly, Pvt. Jonathan I. Falaniko, Sgt. James D. Faulkner, Pfc. Raymond J. Faulstich Jr., Capt. Brian R. Faunce, Capt. Arthur L. Felder, 2nd Lt. Paul M. Felsberg, Spc. Rian C. Ferguson, Master Sgt. Richard L. Ferguson, Master Sgt. George A. Fernandez, Staff Sgt. Clint D. Ferrin, Spc. Jon P. Fettig, Cpl. Tyler R. Fey, Sgt. Jeremy J. Fischer, Sgt. Paul F. Fisher, Lance Cpl. Dustin R. Fitzgerald, Pfc. Jacob S. Fletcher, Spc. Thomas A. Foley III, Sgt. Timothy Folmar, Gunnery Sgt. Elia P. Fontecchio, Spc. Jason C. Ford, Capt. Travis A. Ford, Chief Warrant Officer Wesley C. Fortenberry, Sgt. 1st Class Bradley C. Fox, Spc. Craig S. Frank, Lance Cpl. Phillip E. Frank, Staff Sgt. Bobby C. Franklin, Pvt. Robert L. Frantz, Pvt. Benjamin L. Freeman, Sgt. David T. Friedrich, Spc. Luke P. Frist, Spc. Adam D. Froehlich, Pvt. Kurt R. Frosheiser, Pfc. Nichole M. Frye, Sgt. 1st Class Dan H. Gabrielson, Lance Cpl. Jonathan E. Gadsden, Capt. Richard J. Gannon II, Spc. Tomas Garces, Lance Cpl. Derek L. Gardner, Cpl. Jose A. Garibay, Spc. Joseph M. Garmback Jr., Sgt. Landis W. Garrison, Sgt. Justin W. Garvey, Spc. Israel Garza.

1st Sgt. Joe J. Garza, Pfc. Juan Guadalupe Garza Jr, Spc. Christopher D. Gelineau, Lance Cpl. Cory Ryan Guerin, Cpl. Christopher A. Gibson, Pvt. Jonathan L. Gifford, Pvt. Kyle C. Gilbert, Command Sgt. Maj. Cornell W. Gilmore, Petty Officer 3rd Class Ronald A. Ginther, Pfc. Jesse A. Givens, Spc. Michael T. Gleason, Cpl. Todd J. Godwin, 2nd Lt. James Michael Goins, Spc. Christopher A. Golby, Spc. David J. Goldberg, Lance Cpl. Shane L. Goldman, Cpl. Armando Ariel Gonzalez, Lance Cpl. Benjamin R. Gonzalez, Cpl. Jesus A. Gonzalez, Cpl. Jorge Gonzalez, Lance Cpl. Victor A. Gonzalez, Cpl. Bernard G. Gooden, Pfc. Gregory R. Goodrich, Sgt. 1st Class Richard S. Gottfried, Spc. Richard A. Goward, 2nd Lt. Jeffrey C. Graham, Sgt. Jamie A. Gray, Petty Officer 2nd Class Michael J. Gray, Sgt. Tommy L. Gray, Lance Cpl. Torrey L. Gray, Cpl. Jeffrey G. Green, Lt. Col. David S. Greene, Pfc. Devin J. Grella, Spc. Kyle A. Griffin, Staff Sgt. Patrick Lee Griffin Jr., Cpl. Sean R. Grilley, Pvt. Joseph R. Guerrera, Chief Warrant Officer Hans N. Gukeisen, Pfc. Christian D. Gurtner, Lance Cpl. Jose Gutierrez, Pfc. Richard W. Hafer, Staff Sgt. Guy S. Hagy Jr., Spc. Charles G. Haight, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Halal, Pfc. Deryk L. Hallal, Pvt. Jesse M. Halling, Pfc. Andrew Halverson, Chief Warrant Officer Erik A. Halvorsen, Capt. Kimberly N. Hampton, Sgt. Michael S. Hancock.

Pfc. Fernando B. Hannon, Sgt. Warren S. Hansen, Sgt. James W. Harlan, Sgt. Atanacio Haro Marin, Staff Sgt. William M. Harrell, Sgt. Foster L. Harrington, Pfc. Adam J. Harris, Sgt. Kenneth W. Harris Jr., Pfc. Torry D. Harris, Pfc. Leroy Harris-Kelly, Pfc. John D. Hart, Sgt. Nathaniel Hart, Sgt. 1st Class David A. Hartman, Sgt. Jonathan N. Hartman, Staff Sgt. Stephen C. Hattamer, Staff Sgt. Omer T. Hawkins II, Sgt. Timothy L. Hayslett, Chief Warrant Officer Brian D. Hazelgrove, Sgt. David M. Heath, Spc. Justin W. Hebert, Pfc. Damian L. Heidelberg, Pfc. Raheen Tyson Heighter, Spc. Jeremy M. Heines, Staff Sgt. Brian R. Hellerman, Staff Sgt. Terry W. Hemingway, Cpl. Matthew C. Henderson, 1st Lt. Robert L. Henderson II, Staff Sgt. Kenneth W. Hendrickson, Sgt. Jack T. Hennessy, Spc. Joshua J. Henry, Pfc. Clayton W. Henson, Spc. Armando Hernandez, Spc. Joseph F. Herndon II, Pfc. Edward J. Herrgott, Spc. Jacob B. Herring, Sgt. 1st Class Gregory B. Hicks, Spc. Christopher K. Hill, Spc. Stephen D. Hiller, Sgt. Keicia M. Hines, Pfc. Melissa J. Hobart, Sgt. Nicholas M. Hodson, Sgt. 1st Class James T. Hoffman, Spc. Christopher J. Holland, Staff Sgt. Aaron N. Holleyman, Staff Sgt. Lincoln D. Hollinsaid, Spc. James J. Holmes, Spc. Jeremiah J. Holmes, Cpl. Terry Holmes, Airman 1st Class Antoine J. Holt, Pfc. Sean Horn, Master Sgt. Kelly L. Hornbeck.

Staff Sgt. Jeremy R. Horton, Capt. Andrew R. Houghton, Lance Cpl Gregory C. Howman, Pfc. Bert E. Hoyer, Spc. Corey A. Hubbell, Pfc. Christopher E. Hudson, 1st Lt. Doyle M. Hufstedler, Staff Sgt. Jamie L. Huggins, Spc. Eric R. Hull, Cpl Barton R. Humlhanz, Lance Cpl. Justin T. Hunt, Spc. Simeon Hunte, 1st Lt. Joshua C. Hurley, Lance Cpl. James B. Huston Jr., Lance Cpl. Seth Huston, Pvt. Nolen R. Hutchings, Pfc. Ray J. Hutchinson, Pfc. Gregory P. Huxley Jr., Spc. Benjamin W. Isenberg, Spc. Craig S. Ivory, Pfc. Leslie D. Jackson, Spc. Morgen N. Jacobs, Chief Warrant Officer Scott Jamar, Cpl. Evan T. James, 2nd Lt. Luke S. James, Spc. William A. Jeffries, Petty Officer 2nd Class Robert B. Jenkins, Sgt. Troy David Jenkins, Spc. Darius T. Jennings, Pfc. Ryan M. Jerabek, Sgt. Linda C. Jimenez, 1st Lt. Oscar Jimenez, Capt. Christopher B. Johnson, Spc. David W. Johnson, Pfc. Howard Johnson II, Spc. John P. Johnson, Pfc. Markus J. Johnson, Spc. Maurice J. Johnson, Hospital Corpsman 3rd Class Michael Vann Johnson Jr., Spc. Nathaniel H. Johnson, Staff Sgt. Paul J. Johnson, Chief Warrant Officer, Pfc. Rayshawn S. Johnson, Pvt. Devon D. Jones, Capt. Gussie M. Jones, Staff Sgt. Raymond E. Jones Jr., Spc. Rodney A. Jones, Lt. Kylan A. Jones- Huffman, Sgt. Curt E. Jordan Jr., Sgt. Jason D. Jordan.

Staff Sgt. Phillip A. Jordan, Cpl. Forest J. Jostes, Spc. Spencer T. Karol, Spc. Michael G. Karr Jr., Spc. Mark J. Kasecky, 1st Lt. Jeffrey J. Kaylor, Spc. Chad L. Keith, Lance Cpl. Quinn A. Keith, Lance Cpl. Bryan P. Kelly, Cpl. Brian Kennedy, Chief Warrant Officer Kyran E. Kennedy, Staff Sgt. Morgan D. Kennon, 1st Lt. Christopher J. Kenny, Spc. Jonathan R. Kephart, Cpl. Dallas L. Kerns, Chief Warrant Officer Erik C. Kesterson, Capt. Humayun S. M. Khan, Spc. James M. Kiehl, Pt. Jeungjin Na Kim, Staff Sgt. Kevin C. Kimmerly. Spc. Levi B. Kinchen, Staff Sgt. Lester O. Kinney II, Pfc. David M. Kirchhoff, Staff Sgt. Charles A. Kiser, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Brian Kleiboeker, Spc. John K. Klinesmith Jr., Sgt. Floyd G. Knighten Jr., Petty Officer 3rd Class Eric L. Knott, Spc. Joshua L. Knowles, Staff Sgt. Lance J. Koenig, Cpl. Kevin T. Kolm, Pfc. Martin W. Kondor, Chief Warrant Patrick W. Kordsmeier, Capt. Edward J. Korn, Sgt. Bradley S. Korthaus, Cpl. Jakub Henryk Kowalik, Sgt. Elmer C. Krause, Pvt. Dustin L. Kreider, Pfc. Bradley G. Kritzer, Capt. John F. Kurth, Sgt. 1st Class William W. Labadie Jr., Sgt. Joshua S. Ladd, Sgt. Michael V. Lalush, Lance Cpl. Alan Dinh Lam, Spc. Charles R. Lamb, Spc. James I. Lambert III, Pfc. James P. Lambert, Sgt. Jonathan W. Lambert, Capt. Andrew David Lamont, Staff Sgt. Sean G. Landrus, Gunnery Sgt. Shawn A. Lane.

Pfc. Moises A. Langhorst, Spc. Tracy L. Laramore, Spc. Scott Q. Larson Jr., Chief Warrant Officer Matthew C. Laskowski, Staff Sgt. William T. Latham, Pfc. Karina S. Lau, Cpl. Jeffrey D. Lawrence, Staff Sgt. Mark A. Lawton, Lance Cpl. Travis J. Layfield, Staff Sgt. Rene Ledesma, 2nd Lt. Ryan Leduc, Cpl. Bum R. Lee, Pfc. Ken W. Leisten, Staff Sgt. Jerome Lemon, Spc. Cedric L. Lennon, Pfc. Farad K. Letufuga, Spc. Justin W. Linden, Spc. Roger G. Ling, Spc. Joseph L. Lister, Staff Sgt. Nino D. Livaudais, Sgt. Dale T. Lloyd, Sgt. Daniel J. Londono, Spc. Ryan P. Long, Spc. Zachariah W. Long, Pfc. Duane E. Longstreth, Sgt. Edgar E. Lopez, Lance Cpl. Juan Lopez, Sgt. Richard M. Lord, Staff Sgt. David L. Loyd, Capt. Robert L. Lucero, Pfc. Jason C. Ludiam, Lance Cpl. Jacob R. Lugo, Pfc. Jason N. Lynch, Pfc. Christopher D. Mabry, Lance Cpl. Gregory E. MacDonald, Lance Cpl. Cesar F. Machado-Olmos, Pfc. Vorn J. Mack, Lance Cpl. Joseph B. Maglione, Spc. William J. Maher III, Staff Sgt. Toby W. Mallet, Chief Warrant Officer Ian D. Manuel, Pfc. Pablo Manzano, Pfc. Lyndon A. Marcus Jr., Staff Sgt. Paul C. Mardis Jr., Cpl. Douglas Jose Marencoreyes, Master Sgt. Jude C. Mariano, Spc. James E. Marshall, Sgt. 1st Class John W. Marshall, Pfc. Ryan A. Martin, Staff Sgt. Stephen G. Martin.

Sgt. Francisco Martinez, Pfc. Francisco A. Martinez Flores, Pfc. Jesse J. Martinez, Spc. Michael A. Martinez, Pfc. Oscar A. Martinez, Spc. Jacob D. Martir, Sgt. Arthur S. Mastrapa, Chief Warrant Officer Johnny Villareal Mata, Lance Cpl. Ramon Mateo, Spc. Clint Richard Matthews, Lance Cpl. Ramon Mateo, Cpl. Matthew E. Matula, Staff Sgt. Donald C. May Jr, Pfc. Joseph P. Mayek, Spc. Patrick R. McCaffrey Sr., Lance Cpl. Joseph C. MacCarthy, Pfc. Ryan M. McCauley, Cpl. Brad P. McCormick, 1st Lt. Erik. S. McCrae, Spc. Donald R. McCune, Spc. Dustin K. McGaugh, Pfc. Holly J. McGeogh, Sgt. Brian D. McGinnis, Spc. Michael A. McGlothin. Petty Officer 2nd Class Scott R. McHugh, Hospitalman Joshua McIntosh, Spc. David M. McKeever, Spc. Eric S. McKinley, Pvt. Robert L. McKinley, Staff Sgt. Don S. McMahan, Sgt. Heath A. McMillin, 1st Lt. Brian M. McPhillips, Cpl. Jesus Martin Antonio Medellin, Spc. Irving Medina, Spc. Kenneth A. Melton, Cpl. Jaygee Meluat, Petty Officer 3rd Class Fernando A. Mendezaceves, Gunnery Sgt. Joseph Menusa, Staff Sgt. Eddie E. Menyweather, Spc. Gil Mercado, Spc. Michael M. Merila, Spc. Christopher A. Merville, Sgt. Daniel K. Methvin, Pfc. Jason M. Meyer, Sgt. Eliu A. Miersandoval, Spc. Michael G. Mihalakis, Pfc. Matthew G. Milczark, Cpl. Jason David Mileo, Pfc. Anthony S. Miller, Pfc. Bruce Miller Jr., Staff Sgt. Frederick L. Miller Jr.

Sgt. 1st Class Marvin L. Miller, Sgt. Joseph Minucci II, Sgt. First Class Troy L. Miranda, Spc. George A. Mitchell, Sgt. Keman L. Mitchell, Sgt. Michael W. Mitchell, Spc. Sean R. Mitchell, Pfc. Jesse D. Mizener, Staff Sgt. Jorge A. Molinabautista, Pfc. Anthony W. Monroe, 1st Lt. Adam G. Mooney, Lance Cpl. Jason William Moore, Pfc. Stuart W. Moore, Sgt. Travis A. Moothart, Spc. Jose L. Mora, Sgt. Melvin Y. Mora, Pfc. Michael A. Mora, Master Sgt. Kevin N. Morehead, Capt. Brent L. Morel, Petty Officer 3rd Class David J. Moreno, Sgt. Gerardo Moreno, Spc. Jaime Moreno, Pfc. Luis A. Moreno, Spc. Dennis B. Morgan, Staff Sgt. Richard L. Morgan Jr., Pfc. Geoffery S. Morris, Pfc. Ricky A. Morris Jr., Lance Cpl. Nicholas B. Morrison, Sgt. Shawna M. Morrison, Sgt. Keelan L. Moss, Spc. Clifford L. Moxley Jr., Sgt. Cory R. Mracek, Sgt. Rodney A. Murray, Sgt. Krisna Nachampassak, Spc. Paul T. Nakamura, Spc. Nathan W. Nakis, Pvt. Kenneth A. Nalley, Chief Warrant Officer Christopher G. Nason, Maj. Kevin G. Nave, Spc. Rafael L. Navea, Spc. Charles L. Neeley, Staff Sgt. Paul M. Neff II, Pfc. Gavin L. Neighbor, Spc. Joshua M. Neusche, Cpl. Dominique J. Nicolas, Lance Cpl. Joseph L. Nice, Spc. Isaac Michael Nieves, Lance Cpl. Patrick R. Nixon, Spc. Allen Nolan, Spc. Marcos O. Nolasco.

Sgt. William J. Normandy, Spc. Joseph C. Norquist, 1st Lt. Leif E. Nott, Staff Sgt. Todd E. Nunes, Spc. David T. Nutt, Cpl. Mick R. Nygardbekowsky, Spc. Donald S. Oak Jr., Pfc. Branden F. Oberleitner, Lance Cpl. Patrick T. O'Day, Spc. Charles E. Odums II, Spc. Ramon C. Ojeda, Cpl. Terry Holmes Ordonez, Cpl. Brian Oliveira, Spc. Justin B. Onwordi, Spc. Richard P. Orengo, Lt. Col. Kim S. Orlando, Lance Cpl. Eric J. Orlowski, 1st Lt. Osbaldo Orozco, Pfc. Cody J. Orr, Staff Sgt. Billy J. Orton, Sgt. Pamela G. Osbourne, Lance Cpl. Deshon E. Otey, Pfc. Kevin C. Ott, Sgt. Michael G. Owen, Lance Cpl. David Edward Owens Jr, Sgt. Fernando Padilla- Ramirez, Pvt. Shawn D. Pahnke, Spc. Gabriel T. Palacios, Capt. Eric T. Paliwoda, 1st Lt. Joshua M. Palmer, Staff Sgt. Dale A. Panchot, Pfc. Daniel R. Parker, Pfc. James D. Parker, Pfc. Kristen Parker, Cpl. Tommy L. Parker Jr., Sgt. Harvey E. Parkerson III, Sgt. David B. Parson, Staff Sgt. Esau G. Patterson Jr., Master Sgt. William L. Payne, Sgt. Michael F. Pedersen, Staff Sgt. Abraham D. Penamedina, Spc. Brian H. Penisten, Sgt. Ross A. Pennanen, Staff Sgt. Gregory V. Pennington, Pfc. Geoffrey Perez, Staff Sgt. Hector R. Perez, Sgt. Joel Perez, Spc. Jose A. Perez III, Pfc. Luis A. Perez, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Perez.

Spc. Wilfredo Perez Jr., Petty Officer 1st Class Michael J. Pernaselli, Staff Sgt. David S. Perry, Pfc. Charles C. Persing, Staff Sgt. Dustin W. Peters, Spc. Alyssa R. Peterson, Staff Sgt. Brett J. Petriken, Staff Sgt. James L. Pettaway Jr., Staff Sgt. Erickson H. Petty, Pfc. Jerrick M. Petty, Lt. Col. Mark P. Phelan, Pfc. Chance R. Phelps, Sgt. 1st Class Gladimir Philippe, Sgt. Ivory L. Phipps, Capt. Pierre E. Piche, Pfc. Lori Piestewa, Capt. Dennis L. Pintor, Spc. James H. Pirtle, Pfc. Jason T. Poindexter, 2nd Lt. Frederick E. Pokorney Jr., Staff Sgt. Andrew R. Pokorny, Spc. Justin W. Pollard, Spc. Larry E. Polley Jr., Sgt. Darrin K. Potter, Pfc. David L. Potter, Sgt. Christopher S. Potts, Spc. James E. Powell, Lance Cpl. Caleb J. Powers, Cpl. Dean P. Pratt, Pfc. James E. Prevete, Pvt. Kelley S. Prewitt, Sgt. Tyler D. Prewitt, Pfc. James W. Price, 1st Lt. Timothy E. Price, Lance Cpl. Mathew D. Puckett, Sgt. Jaror C. Puello- Coronado, Staff Sgt. Michael B. Quinn, Staff Sgt. Richard P. Ramey, Sgt. Christopher Ramirez, Spc. Eric U. Ramirez, Pfc. William C. Ramirez, Pfc. Christopher Ramos, Spc. Tamarra J. Ramos, Pfc. Brandon Ramsey, Pvt. Carson J. Ramsey, Sgt. Edmond L. Randle, Pfc. Cleston C. Raney, Capt. Gregory A. Ratzlaff, Spc. Rel A. Ravago IV, Spc. Omead H. Razani.

Spc. Brandon M. Read, Pfc. Christopher J. Reed, Pfc. Ryan E. Reed, Sgt. Tatjana Reed, Staff Sgt. Aaron T. Reese, Spc. Jeremy F. Regnier, Sgt. 1st Class Randall S. Rehn, Sgt. Brendon C. Reiss, Staff Sgt. George S. Rentschler, Sgt. Sean C. Reynolds, Lance Cpl. Rafael Reynosa- Suarez, Sgt. Yadir G. Reynoso, Cpl. Demetrius L. Rice, Sgt. Ariel Rico, Spc. Jeremy L. Ridlen, Pfc. Diego Fernando Rincon, Cpl. Steven A. Rintamaki, Sgt. Duane R. Rios, Capt. Russell B. Rippetoe, Pfc. Henry C. Risner, Sgt. 1st Class Jose A. Rivera, Cpl. John T. Rivero, Spc. Frank K. Rivers Jr., Sgt. Thomas D. Robbins, Sgt. Todd J. Robbins, Lance Cpl. Anthony P. Roberts, Lance Cpl. Bob W. Roberts, Spc. Robert D. Roberts, Staff Sgt. Joseph E. Robsky, Sgt. Moses D. Rocha, Pfc. Marlin T. Rockhold, Pfc. Jose Francis Gonzalez Rodriguez, Cpl. Robert M. Rodriguez, Spc. Philip G. Rogers, Sgt. 1st Class Robert E. Rooney, Cpl. Randal Kent Rosacker, Staff Sgt. Victor A. Rosales, Pfc. Richard H. Rosas, Sgt. Scott C. Rose, Sgt. Thomas C. Rosenbaum, Sgt. Randy S. Rosenberg, Spc. Marco D. Ross, Sgt. Lawrence A. Roukey, Capt. Alan Rowe, Spc. Brandon J. Rowe, Sgt. Roger D. Rowe, 2nd Lt. Jonathan D. Rozier, Spc. Isela Rubalcava, Pfc. Aaron J. Rusin, Sgt. John W. Russell.

1st Lt. Timothy Louis Ryan, Chief Warrant Officer Scott A. Saboe, Spc. Rasheed Sahib, Cpl. Rudy Salas, Cpl. William I. Salazar, 1st Lt. Edward M. Saltz, Capt. Benjamin W. Sammis, Spc. Sonny G. Sampler, Spc. Gregory P. Sanders, Pfc. Leroy Sandoval Jr., Spc. Matthew J. Sandri, Staff Sgt. Barry Sanford, 1st Lt. Neil Anthony Santoriello, Spc. Jonathan J. Santos, Pfc. Brandon R. Sapp, Staff Sgt. Cameron B. Sarno, Staff Sgt. Scott D. Sather, Lance Cpl. Jeremiah E. Savage, Capt. Robert C. Scheetz Jr., Spc. Justin B. Schmidt, Spc. Jeremiah W. Schmunk, Pfc. Sean M. Schneider, Cpl. Dustin H. Schrage, Maj. Mathew E. Schram, Lance Cpl. Brian K. Schramm, Spc. Christian C. Schulz, Master Sgt. David A. Scott, Pfc. Kerry D. Scott, Spc. Stephen M. Scott, Spc. Marc S. Seiden, Capt. Christopher Scott Seifert, Pfc. Dustin M. Sekula, Lance Cpl. Matthew K. Serio, Sgt. Juan M. Serrano, Staff Sgt. Wentz Jerome Henry Shanaberger III, Spc. Jeffrey R. Shaver, Maj. Kevin M. Shea, Spc. Casey Sheehan, Sgt. Kevin F. Sheehan, Sgt. Daniel Michael Shepherd, Sgt. Alan D. Sherman, Lt. Col. Anthony L. Sherman, Pfc. Harry N. Shondee Jr., Lance Cpl. Brad S. Shuder, Capt. James A. Shull, Pfc. Kenneth L. Sickels, Lance Cpl. Dustin L. Sides, Cpl. Erik H. Silva, Pvt. Sean A. Silva, Sgt. Leonard D. Simmons.

Pfc. Charles M. Sims, Lance Cpl. John T. Sims Jr., Spc. Uday Singh, Spc. Aaron J. Sissel, Pfc. Christopher A. Sisson, Pfc. Nicholas M. Skinner, Petty Officer 3rd Class David Sisung, 1st Lt. Brian D. Slavenas, Pvt. Brandon Ulysses Sloan, Lance Cpl. Richard P. Slocum, Lance Cpl. Thomas J. Slocum, Pfc. Corey L. Small, Sgt. Keith L. Smette, Capt. Benedict J. Smith, Sgt. Benjamin K. Smith, Pfc. Brandon C. Smith, 2nd Lt. Brian D. Smith, Chief Warrant Officer Bruce A. Smith, Cpl. Darrell L. Smith, 1st Sgt. Edward Smith, Chief Warrant Officer Eric A. Smith, Pfc. Jeremiah D. Smith, Lance Cpl. Matthew R. Smith, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Smith Jr., Spc. Orenthial J. Smith, Sgt. 1st Class Paul R. Smith, Capt. Christopher F. Soelzer, Sgt. Roderic A. Solomon, Cpl. Adrian V. Soltau, Maj. Charles R. Soltes Jr., Sgt. Skipper Soram, Pfc. Armando Soriano, Cpl. Tomas Sotelo Jr., Pfc. Kenneth C. Souslin, Spc. Philip I. Spakosky, Pfc. Jason L. Sparks, Cpl. Michael R. Speer, Staff Sgt. Trevor Spink, Maj. Christopher J. Splinter, Sgt. Marvin R. Sprayberry III, Pvt. Bryan N. Spry, Sgt. Maj. Michael B. Stack, Pfc. Nathan E. Stahl, 1st Lt. Andrew K. Stern, Staff Sgt. Robert A. Stever, Maj. Gregory Stone, 2nd Lt. Matthew R. Stovall, Pfc. William R. Strange, Sgt. Kirk Allen Straseskie, Pfc. Brandon C. Sturdy.

Spc. William R. Sturges Jr., Spc. Paul J. Sturino, Lance Cpl. Jesus A. Suarez Del Solar, Spc. Joseph D. Suell, Spc. John R. Sullivan, Spc. Narson B. Sullivan, Lance Cpl. Vincent M. Sullivan, Staff Sgt. Michael J. Sutter, Pfc. Ernest Harold Sutphin, Chief Warrant Officer Sharon T. Swartworth, Spc. Thomas J. Sweet II, Staff Sgt. Christopher W. Swisher, Maj. Paul R. Syverson III, Sgt. Patrick S. Tainsh, Sgt. DeForest L. Talbert, Sgt. 1st Class Linda Ann Tarango-Griess, Spc. Christopher M. Taylor, Maj. Mark D. Taylor, Capt. John R. Teal, Staff Sgt. Riayan A. Tejeda, Lance Cpl. Jason Andrew Tetrault, Spc. Joseph C. Thibodeaux, Master Sgt. Thomas R. Thigpen Sr., Cpl. Jesse L. Thiry, Sgt. Carl Thomas, Staff Sgt. Kendall Thomas, Spc. Kyle G. Thomas, Sgt. Anthony O. Thompson, Spc. Jarrett B. Thompson, Sgt. Humberto F. Timoteo, Capt. John E. Tipton, Pfc. Joshua K. Titcomb, Spc. Brandon T. Titus, Spc. Brandon S. Tobler, Sgt. Lee D. TodacheeneCpl. John H. Todd III, Sgt. Nicholas A. Tomko, Master Sgt. Timothy Toney, Pfc. George D. Torres, Lance Cpl. Michael S. Torres, 2nd Lt. Richard Torres, Spc. Ramon Reyes Torres, Lance Cpl. Elias Torrez III, Sgt. Michael L. Tosto, Spc. Richard K. Trevithick, Pfc. Andrew L. Tuazon, Staff Sgt. Roger C. Turner Jr., Pvt. Scott M. Tyrrell, 2nd Lt. Andre D. Tyson, Spc. Eugene A. Uhl III, Lance Cpl. Drew M. Uhles.

Rick A. Ulbright, Pfc. Daniel P. Unger, Spc. Robert Oliver Unruh, 1st Sgt. Ernest E. Utt, Sgt. Michael A. Uvanni, Staff Sgt. Gary A. Vaillant, Lance Cpl. Ruben Valdez Jr., Sgt. Melissa Valles, Spc. Allen J. Vandayburg, Spc. Josiah H. Vandertulip, Chief Warrant Officer Brian K. Van Dusen, Lance Cpl. John J. Vangyzen IV, Lance Cpl. Gary F. Van Leuven, Staff Sgt. Mark D. Vasquez, Spc. Frances M. Vega, 1st Lt. Michael W. Vega, Staff Sgt. Paul A. Velazquez, Cpl. David M. Vicente, Sgt. 1st Class Joselito O. Villanueva, Cpl. Scott M. Vincent, Staff Sgt. Kimberly A. Voelz, Staff Sgt. Michael S. Voss, Spc. Thai Vue, Lance Cpl. Michael B. Wafford, Sgt. Christopher A. Wagener, Sgt. Gregory L. Wahl, Staff Sgt. Allan K. Walker, Sgt. Jeffery C. Walker, Sgt. Donald Ralph Walters, Pvt. Jason M. Ward, Pfc. Nachez Washalanta, Lance Cpl. Christopher B. Wasser, Pvt. David L. Waters, Staff Sgt. Kendall Damon Waters-Bey, Maj. William R. Watkins III, Petty Officer 2nd Class Christopher E. Watts, Chief Warrant Officer Aaron A. Weaver, Spc. Michael S. Weger, Staff Sgt. David J. Weisenburg, Spc. Douglas J. Weismantle, Pfc. Michael Russell Creighton Weldon, Lance Cpl. Larry L. Wells, Chief Warrant Officer Stephen M. Wells, Spc. Jeffrey M. Wershow, Spc. Christopher J. Rivera Wesley, Sgt. James G. West, 1st Lt. Alexander E. Wetherbee, Spc. Donald L. Wheeler, Sgt. Mason Douglas Whetstone, Pfc. Marquis A. Whitaker.

Staff Sgt. Aaron Dean White, Lt. Nathan D. White, Sgt. Steven W. White, Lance Cpl. William W. White, Pfc. Joey D. Whitener, Spc. Chase R. Whitman, Spc. Michael J. Wiesemann, Cpl. Joshua S. Wilfong, Sgt. Eugene Williams, Lance Cpl. Michael J. Williams, Spc. Michael L. Williams, Sgt. Taft V. Williams, 1st Lt. Charles L. Wilkins III, Sgt. 1st Class Christopher R. Willoughby, Spc. Dana N. Wilson, Command Sgt. Maj. Jerry L. Wilson, Staff Sgt. Joe N. Wilson, Lance Cpl. Lamont N. Wilson, Lance Cpl. Nicholas Wilt, 1st Lt. Ronald Winchester, Spc. Trevor A. Wine, Lance Cpl. William J. Wiscowiche, Spc. Robert A. Wise, Spc. Michelle M. Witmer, Pfc. Owen D. Witt, Spc. James R. Wolf, 2nd Lt. Jeremy L. Wolfe, Sgt. Elijah Tai Wah Wong, Sgt. Brian M. Wood, Capt. George A. Wood, Spc. Michael R. Woodliff, Spc. James C. Wright, Pfc. Jason G. Wright, 2nd Lt. John T. Wroblewski, Lance Cpl. Daniel R. Wyatt, Pfc. Stephen E. Wyatt, Sgt. Michael E. Yashinski, Sgt. Henry Ybarra III, Pfc. Rodricka A. Youmans, Sgt. Ryan C. Young, Lance Cpl. Andrew J. Zabierek, Spc. Nicholas J. Zangara, Spc. Mark Anthony Zapata, Pfc. Nicholaus E. Zimmer, Cpl. Ian T. Zook, Lance Cpl. Robert P. Zurheide Jr.

cheer up, eh...

cheer up!!! it was just an election in a land far far away... here read this and put a smile on your face!!!

BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) Some Walmart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item: Wal-Mart's own brand of wine.The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, California, to produce the spirits at an affordable price, in the $2-5 range.While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw bottle of Walmart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for cheap wine, said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger Williams University in Bristol, R.I. She said: "The right name is important."

So, here we go:

The Top 12 suggested names for Walmart Wine:

12. Chateau Traileur Parc
11. White Trashfindel
10. Big Red Gulp
9. Grape Expectations
8. Domaine Wal-Mart "Merde du Pays"
7. NASCARbernet
6. Chef Boyardeaux
5. Peanut Noir
4. Chateau des Moines
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Riesling

And the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine

.... 1. Nasti Spumante

now, you gotta feel better. dem americans ain't so bad, eh. they's kinda funny.

damn the prediction...

i guess alot can be said about the election last night, the campaign, and the past 4 years, but as the results rolled in, a wave of relief came over me.

relief that:

1) i'm not an american...

2) the longest campaign in the history of the "civilized" world was finally over and i wouldn't have to listen to those idiot politicians for awhile...

am i really surprised by the results? not really.

would it of really made a difference if the results were reversed? no and maybe... no, the war in iraq would rage on regardless. if kerry did have a viable plan to bring peace to iraq (i'm somewhat skeptical), it would of been refreshing.

at least, with dubya winning, we'll be dealing with the devil we know...

sadly, that's absolutely the best spin i can put on the result of last night's election.

CBS

i watched at the edge of my seat for most of the night. mostly i watched newsworld's/cbc's uninspired graphics. i generally avoided, except pbs, tuning into the SAA (the Stenographers' Association of America) AKA CBS, NBC, and ABC. oddly enough i found myself at 2 o'clock in the morning watching dan rather and his lackies. dan was still refusing to declare dubya the winner (quite amusing at that hour of the morning). he was persistantly asking his co-anchor analyst ed bradley about various scenarios of how kerry could come from behind in ohio.

ed would analyse the situation in certain counties in ohio and the provisional ballots, an unlikely source of victory, and surmised that it was impossible for kerry to win the state.

i think he repeated it twice, as dan kept coming back with the same question.

each time dan would respond with, "so ed, what are you really saying...".

that drove me crazy. dan, just say what's really on your mind!!!!!!!!

then another 60 minutes panelist, lesley stahl, choking back the tears, piped, "i'm really worried that this uncertainty (in the result), will hurt the country..." really lesley. i didn't know you felt this way.

dan came to the rescue. "as long as i can choke a buzzard on a lonely stretch of dusty country road, don't worry... america is strong. we shall overcome."

dan. some advice: i think it's time for you to follow in the footsteps of your buddy, tom brokaw, and enjoy your last days flyfishing or maybe choking some buzzards in wyoming...

bring on a new generation of stenographers...

(i think i just used the word choke 3 times in this segment, ugh...)

final thought...

i understood that alot of democrats said before the election that they would move to canada if dubya won. you're welcome but i'd rather you stay home and live with the results.

i live in alberta. i've got to live with ralphie everyday... so, i'll understand your circumstance.

predictions, predictions, predictions

the next president of the united states will be george dubya bush. his brother will deliver the electoral seats for the state of florida. that leaves ohio and pennsylvania. he will lose ohio and squeak out pennsylvania. that's 2 out of 3 swing states for dubya. that means victory for dubya. for the love of god, i hope i'm wrong...

the bush sisters will be the life of the inauguration party only after dick cheney, as a practical joke, feigns a cornary infarction. neither the dixie chix nor bruce springsteen will be performing...

osama bin laden will not be caught on dubya's watch. too many family ties...

the eskimos will beat the roughriders. the lions will defeat the eskimos. the tiger-cats will pummel the argos. the alouette will hang on to defeat the tiger-cats. drumroll... the lions will beat the alouette to win the grey cup, to the great consternation of stamp fans...

the grey cup will be won on the last play of the game on a trick play involving an "on side" kick or punt. the "on side" player who recovers the ball will only be noticed because he will fire off an incendiary device planted either on his helmet or in his pants.

the stamps will miss the playoffs in 2005.

ralph klein will be the next premier of alberta. ok, that's a stretch... even if he tends to his ill mother the rest of the campaign. his party will lose 2 additional seats to the opposition. one of which will be in calgary of all places.

singer joni mitchell will arrive at the "order of canada" induction ceremony in a "big yellow taxi", only to declare that "'i'm a radio' and am ineligible for the award but please 'help me'".

newfoundland will receive 100 percent of off-shore oil and gas revenues only after paul martin receives assurances that the "rest of canada" will get joey smallwood and rex murphy in return.

paul martin will lose the next election in a landslide...

tweeds will come back into fashion...

ralphie's quotes of the day...

ralphie klein: the severely normal premier of alberta

ralphie blah:

"They didn't look severely handicapped to me. I'll tell you that for sure. Both had cigarettes dangling from their mouths, and cowboy hats."

"I know the CBC wants me to talk about AISH [province's program for the severely disabled]. I'm sure none of you want to talk to me about AISH, do you? No, because you're normal severely normal." [bubba's note: i thank my lucky stars i'm one of the severely normal ones... or am i?]

source: the severely abnormal cbc

run for your lives!!!!!!!!

© 2004 thinsoapy films

i hope everyone had the chance to see the spectacular lunar eclipse last night.

thanx dave and gina for the swell picture.

if you haven't already bookmarked it, the RASC (calgary chapter) has all the info for such celestial events... i'm such a science geek.

the hardest working man in show biz...

the godfather of soul.

macewan hall
december 8th, 2004
calgary, alberta

note from a canadian submariner...

"minor damage" done to the hmcs chicoutimi

i got the following email from a friend of mine who used to be in the navy (in fact, she was rather high up in the chain of command). in it, stuart glen, a petty officer (i think) onboard the ill-fated submarine hmcs chicoutimi, described the time period immediately following the outbreak of fire...


>May be of interest to you. I received it from a friend who didn't identify
> who first received it from PO1 Stuart Glen and then passed it on.
>
> ********************************
> Message From Canadian Sub Crew Member
>
> On behalf of the whole crew of HMCS Chicoutimi, please let me say that we
> appreciate each and every one of the heartfelt messages we've received,
> both in this forum and in others. We performed well - but we were also
> lucky, in equal measure. It could have been far, far worse. The actual
> moment of danger lasted just over 4 or so hours - the vast majority of that
> time being with the submarine solidly filled with very toxic, thick black
> smoke. And, of course, with no power whatsoever to run engines, ventilation
> fans, or the LP Blower. We've always been taught in Sea Training that smoke
> generates rapidly, but until this past week we had no idea what that really
> meant.
>
> When you finish reading this, go stand in your bathroom and picture the
> single entrance being blocked by fire and sparks, accompanied by a very
> loud electrical popping/crackling sound. After 2 seconds - two very short
> seconds, shut out the light. That darkness is what it was like on 01 and 02
> decks on board HMCS Chicoutimi. Everything had to be done by feel -
> provided you were one of the lucky ones who got a mask on their faces. If
> you didn't, then your only conscious thoughts were about locating one in
> the pitch dark, then feeling your way to a spot where the EBS connectors
> were and plugging it in.
>
> I was one of the unfortunate ones who didn't get a mask - I had a person on
> one side of me, and a person on the other - and my path was blocked by one
> of the tables in the C&PO'S mess. I'd been closed up there as part of DCHQ
> (HQ1 to the O Boat types). Not to be overly dramatic about it, but I
> believed that I was going to die. In the microsecond it took my brain to
> work through all the combinations for escape, the result kept coming up the
> same - no way out, and fire/smoke still coming in. I could feel the heat
> beginning to increase. I was fortunate - as were so many of us. Just as my
> brain became resigned to the extremely dangerous position I was in, a fully
> plugged-in EBS mask appeared out of the darkness and thrust into my hands.
> One of the other members in DCHQ had taken the time, as the bangs and
> flashes were going off, to empty the EBS locker at his feet and plug in
> enough for everyone, and started passing them around. He saved my life, and
> the lives of everyone else in that space - but when he reached for his own
> mask, he couldn't find it in the darkness. He managed to escape through
> the glowing doorway to safety, though, fortunately. Elsewhere in the boat,
> a two man team saved more lives. One aggressively snatched passing
> shipmates and bodily shoved them into the Junior Rates Mess while the other
> plunked a mask on their face. We did everything we needed to do, to
> survive - though one of us just didn't make it. Lt. Saunders was to be my direct
> boss when we got back to Halifax - I'm the Combat Systems Engineering Chief
> on board the boat. This trip was to be the time we started working with
> each other, to start the process of running the department together. It is
> sadly ironic that my memories of Chris Saunders will be for the laughs and
> experiences we won't get the chance to share, rather than the few we did.
>
> I cannot talk about specifics, of course, and I know you'll all understand.
> At least not yet. There is a family and a country that deserves answers,
> and the proper route for that is through the Board of Inquiry which is
> starting now. We met them today, and I know several members of it either
> personally or through reputation. It will be thorough, of that there is
> absolutely no doubt whatsoever.
>
> I've been lurking here on the board far too long - time to surface and say
> hello. Some of you will recognize my name, others won't, though I've been
> serving in submarines almost continuously since August, 1981. And banging
> my head on valves since that time, so I must be pretty damn lumpy by
> now. Good to be back, boys, and thank you again.
>
> - Stu
>
> PO1 Stuart Glen

"...you and i were meant to fly" - UPDATED!!!!!

some disturbing events have come to my attention:

Air Canada.


hey celine, you look really hot in that uniform.

i subscribe to air canada's e-letter (i just read it for the articles. i promise). this was in the latest transmission:

Introducing Air Canada’s very own diva and a fresh new look.

By Isabelle Verdi

You and I were meant to fly.

"That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. Canada’s very own superstar diva, Celine Dion, has a new song on the airwaves, and I’ve been humming it all day: “… you and I were meant to fly.” The toe tapping is contagious and this new tune is just one part of Air Canada’s exciting new campaign."

gack... another reason to fly air canada. i can see why their business is in dire straits. there's only room for one diva in the company and that's ceo robert milton! in a related matter, there's now a surcharge on airline tix for overpriced gas. sorry, that's a surcharge for celine dion. same same.

initially, i thought it (i.e. flying) had to do cross-marketing with the cirque du soleil.

garbage in, garbage out...

in other news, lookie here... ralphie's at it again.

ralphie has accused the leader of the opposition, kevin taft, of lying in a opposition report exposing 6 million bucks worth of untendered contracts doled out by his government to "friends of the party".

ralphie was shocked that taft, a university prof. (UPDATE: i shouldn't take ralphie at his word. mr. taft was never a prof. i've got to research this things. i give myself a grade of F), showed abysmal research skills to generate an entirely inaccurate report. he gave the report a grade of D+.

mmmm. if i remember not long ago, ralphie was doctoring papers of his own. not surprisingly, ralphie was cleared on the charge of plagiarism (using internet sources "incorrectly") and given a grade of 77% on a paper supporting the acts of ex-chilean dictator pinochet. now that's justice seen and served...

dave, or any of my loyal readers (2 or 3 others), is that a prime example of irony or what?

oh by the way, ralphie, there's room between a D+ and a F. what happened to that money, eh? ahhh...beer slushie fund at the st. louis. very clever.

what dreams might come and go...


dave, if you were her, we'd have a deal for whatever.

just got a call from dave. he told me about this dream he had last night. long story short, he and i met at a 5 story tall museum in banff. he offered me his ipod and gameboy and asked me if we could call it even...

i'm not sure how to interpret that dream... first, he doesn't own a gameboy or an ipod. second, i'm not sure what the "trade" was for... he says it's with regards to a certain piece of crap electronic device that i lent him. i just hope we had all our clothes on...

this dream is open for interpretations...

top 10 greatest canuckle-heads...

can this geeky stubble jumper be the greatest canuckle-head of all time?

according to the citizens of this great land of canuck-istan, the following is a list of the greatest canuckle-heads of all time (in alphabetical order):

1. Frederick Banting
2. Alexander Graham Bell
3. Don Cherry
4. Tommy Douglas
5. Terry Fox
6. Wayne Gretzky
7. Sir John A. MacDonald
8. Lester B. Pearson
9. Dave Suzuki
10. Pierre Elliot Trudeau.

no, #3 is not a typo. surely, the greatest canuckle-head cannot be a hockey player (even though he was arguably the greatest hockey player ever). sorry wayne. hockey is just a game. frederick banting was just a scientist (though a great one). alexander bell? the telephone has been a lifesaver for sure. it's too bad some idiot bastardized his invention by inventing the cell phone. terry fox was a fundraiser (though an inspirational one). who remembers john a. macdonald? he's ancient history. his idea of a pan-canuckle-head railroad was kind of nifty though. lester b. pearson gave us our flag. a unifying idea i guess. but there isn't a true maple tree west of ontario or north of toronto. sure he won a nobel peace prize. that's cool. in turn he defined canuck-istan's role as peacekeeper for 40 some odd years. but that idea has waned in the recent past. dave suzuki? come on... he's a tv personality. he made everyone more aware of environmental issues. a great achievement. good ideas. he's walked the walk but he's got to show the way with some initiative.

that brings us to trudeau and tommy douglas. trudeau had the likeness of a movie star and was a fighter for lofty things like social justice. he stood up to quebecois separatists and brought home the constitution and amended the charter of rights and freedoms. great stuff. he did alot to polarize this country but he stood his ground.

i just watched one of the 10 documentaries meant to sway our votes. this one featured tommy douglas. i didn't know he contributed so much to canadian life. stuff like healthcare, labour laws, and a bill of rights (one that pre-dated the current charter by 45 years). he was the one who probably did more to improve the lives of canadians than anyone else on the list (banting is a tops if you're a diabetic). he originated and implemented the ideas that define what we are today. characteristics that we've used to distinguish ourselves from the yanks down south.

he deserves our vote (even though he was a benevolent communist)!

i would have like to have seen at least a couple of ladies (i like the ladies...) on the list, starting with nellie mcclung.

in the top 100 list of canuckle-heads, my favourite was #34, hal anderson, a deejay at winnipeg's Power 97, "a regular host of budweiser messy wrestling nights at the henderson draft house". ha! this bastard edged out laura secord #35 and ernie "mr. dress up" coombs #36!

go "pave" go

well, that was a pathetic little election... for those not in the know, i'm talking about the calgary municipal elections that "happened" last night.

only 20 percent of 602,000 eligible voters bothered to show up at the polls. that was a horrendous turnout.

westerner canadians, particularly calgarians, pride themselves in the fight for more democracy in federal political institutions. you know, to have their voices heard. well that's crap, considering the poor turnout tonite. they can't even keep their own house in order. calgarians talk the talk but they've shown that they couldn't give a rats ass about the democratic process.

now to something positive. i didn't want dave "pave" bronconnier back as mayor. he said, a couple of years ago, that calgary wasn't suffering from urban sprawl. i found that statement disconcerting to say the least. he sounded like a real estate developer. or, maybe like the developers financing his re-election.

the whole "pave" demeanor was disconcerting. if you listened to him closely in most occurrences, he didn't really say anything. spin city, my friends. he was a master at it...

there was something about "pave" though, he paved more in 3 years (for better or worse) than al "do not" duerr did in 10 years. for that, in a car crazy city, he will be re-elected.

well, "pave" wacked his opponents tonite, winning 79 percent of the vote. i voted for harinder "harry" dhillon. he accrued only 2 percent of the vote. here's the kicker, i didn't even know who the hell he was until i stepped into the booth. i liked the fact that his name "harry" was in parentheses. "harinder" was just as flattering a name.

jaws

i must admit i've only watched portions of the movie "jaws" until tonite's showing on the cbc. i've never gotten past the really boring first part where the dumb people were trying to figure out whether it was a shark that was attacking people at the beach. this time i watched 95 percent of it. for the most part, it was ok...

some observations:

i've never seen such inept, incompetent group of characters in my life. i think it took pizarro and 180 spanish hoodlums to bring down the Incan empire but it took 3 heavily arm bozos an entire movie to wack a shark.

i think i heard richard dreyfuss call the shark one "fast fish". sharks are NOT fish (dolphins - miami or otherwise are not fish either). i think his character is a phD. nuff said.

i think i heard the boat captain call the shark an "orca". sharks are NOT orca. killer whales are orca, bonehead.

i didn't know sharks held grudges. i mean the one in the movie was not only vindictive but had a long bitter memory. sounds like an ex-girlfriend of mine. ha!

i didn't know wooden boats and explosives were part of a shark's nutritious diet... i guess the shark used the splinters off the wooden planks as toothpicks to dislodge human parts from its plentitude of teeth...

richard dreyfess, playing hooper the shark expert, irritated me. he's played alot of irritating and pesty characters over the years. he's good at it. but i found in this case he went over the top with his performance.

i got my scuba certification last time i was in koh tao, thailand. i was hoping to see a shark. no such luck. apparently, the majority of the sharks in the sea of thailand have been "fished" out.

return of blah

• was listening to the sports last night. chris "i'm not that old" chelios, when asked who should replace the "the incompetent one" (current nhl commissioner, gary bettmen), he replied "wayne gretzy". why the hell would gretzky want that post? the greatest player in history reduced to being the commissioner of hockey?


• was down at the fisher road social services government building. no i'm not on welfare...but pretty damn close though. trying to find a parking space, i couldn't help but notice that the closest stalls to the entrance were reserved for the civil servants. now that's customer service...


• the email service war is on. just noticed that my hotmail account now has a cap of 250 Mb. a small upgrade from a paltry 2 Mb. i wonder if billy gates was given a nudge by the up and coming gmail. bastard wouldn't move otherwise... all that is needed now is an upgrade of the pathetic hotmail servers. why am i complaining? beggars can't be choosers, eh.


• there's a report out there that wayne gretzky may become the next head coach of his phoenix coyotes. why the hell would he do that? he's rich, has a beautiful family, has a swell part-time position as the GM of canada's men's hockey team (which he seems to be good at), has endorsements coming out of the ol' ying yang. why enter the dog-eat-dog world of professional coaching?


• the score was 8 to 3. game 2 of the ALCS. the yankees were beating the crap out of the red sox. it's bottom of the 7th. the red sox have scored all their runs this inning. the next boston player came to bat and cranked the ball outta there for a 2 run home run. wahoo... it's 8 to 5. the yankees were sweating real good right there and then. i turned the channel to the presidential debate and forgot to watch the rest what might have been the greatest comeback in baseball playoff history. what was i thinking?


• big mouth conservative tv talk show host bill o'reilly is being sued for sexual harassment. what's next? the pope is caught buying party hats at a pharmacy?
  

tribute to rodney dangerfield...

"I come from a stupid family. During the civil war my great uncle fought for the West!"

"My father was stupid. He worked in a bank and they caught him stealing pens."

"When I was born..the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father.. 'I'm very sorry. We did everything we could..but he pulled through.'"

"My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend."

"My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet."

"When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up."

"I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio."

"Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt because he leaves a pyramid in every room."

"What a dog I got. His favorite bone is in my arm!"

"I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof!"

"Once when I was lost.. I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him..'Do you think we'll ever find them.' He said..'I don't know kid.. there are so many places they can hide.'"

"I remember I was so depressed I was going to jump out a window on the tenth floor.. so they sent a priest up to talk to me. He said, 'On your mark...'"

"I had a lot of pimples too. One day I fell asleep in a library. I woke up and a blind man was reading my face."

"Last week my tie caught on fire. Some guy tried to put it out with an axe! "

"I went to message parlor. It was self service."

"I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said... 'Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?' She said.. 'No.. I hate myself now.'"

"During sex my wife always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel."

"One day..as I came home early from work.. I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy..'Hey buddy..why are you doing that for?' He said.. 'Because you came home early.'"

"I went to look for a used car. I found my wife's dress in the back seat!"

"I went to see my doctor. I told him once.. "Doctor.. every morning when I get up and look in the mirror..I feel like throwing up; what's wrong with me?" He said..'I don't know but your eyesight is perfect.'"

"I remember when I swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest."

"I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin."


"My psychiatrist told me I'm going crazy. I told him.. "If you don't mind I'd like a second opinion. He said..'Alright..you're ugly too.'"

"Last week I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, “Doc, I keep thinking I’m a dog.” He told me to get off the couch."

"Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home."

"I asked my old man if I could go ice skating on the lake. He told me, 'Wait till it gets warmer.'"

"I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette."

"I tell ya I get no respect from anyone. I bought a cemetery plot. The guy said, 'There goes the neighborhood!"

"When I was born, I was so ugly that the doctor slapped my mother."

"When I started in show business, I played one club that was so far out, my act was reviewed in Field and Stream."

"Every time I get in an elevator, the operator says the same thing to me: `Basement?'"

"When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. ... and no one showed up."

"I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, `Come on over, there's nobody home.' I went over. There was nobody home."

"When I was three years old, my parents got a dog. I was jealous of the dog, so they got rid of me."

"When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's."

"With my wife, I don't get no respect. The other night there was a knock on the front door. My wife told me to hide in the closet."

"With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it."

lines from the movie "back to school"

"During sex, she used to yell out her own name."
"Call me when you have no class."
"One thing about my wife, she gives great headache."
"Hey, Shakesbeer for everyone! Oh, I'd like to tame your shrew."

Rodney Dangerfield (1921-2004)

submarines, blowing in the wind, and the amazing race...

submarine tragedy...

i once bought a slide projector. i found it in the bargain finder. i didn't know much about slide projectors. i forked over 175 bucks. inexplicably, after the 3rd time i used it, the carousel holding the slides wouldn't advance. there was no recourse. well, not in a practical sense.

i very rarely buy used goods anymore. stung by the projector fiasco, i learned that you cannot ever know their history, good or bad. another well known example involves buying a used car. you don't know how a car was driven/maintained by it's previous owner.

that brings us today's tragedy where a canadian submariner lost his life when a fire broke out in a used submarine while submerged in the irish sea. the submarine in question was part of $750 million dollar deal (4 submarines) that the canadian government couldn't resist. it was a bargain alright. from the get-go, these submarines have been outright lemons. the canadian government has never acknowledged this. saving face took priority in this case.

back to the used car example. prudence would say if you consider purchasing a used vehicle, you should at least have a mechanic look under the hood. i don't think the government properly inspected these rust buckets.

you get what you pay for... we should get the navy (or any branch of the arm forces) some top notch (new) equipment or get out of the national defence business altogether.

lowry gardens...

another beautiful day. naturally i went for another long bike ride. this day's objective: lowry gardens located on the southern slopes overlooking the bow river, adjacent to the shaganappi golf course. i heard good things from dave and gina about the park. it was nice. i followed a single gravel path (out of bounds to bikes! ha!) that followed the contour the embankment, winding through the forest. really beautiful views of the river and downtown. i certainly recommend it.

i ran into my friend, sal, on the bow river path. he was biking to his home in the hamptons. i've known sal for along time, ever since second year zoology. he works for parks canada and is officially on strike (ha!). we exchanged pleasantries. he said i should get a bike 'puter. that would take the fun out of biking, eh. i'd rather use pain and fatigue to figure out my progress...

i was lucky all day long. i had a tail wind on the way up. then at 1645h, a cold front rolled in from the north, pushing me all the way home along the deerfoot/bow river bike path. that was fun except for the dust storms.

dream interpretation...

i had a weird dream last night. i was a contestant on the amazing race. i must have been one of the final 3 teams. before the mad dash, i found myself searching for a 7-11 (maybe for a slurpee). i kept looking. the race was about to start. i tried to run for the start line but it seemed i was running on quicksand. i never made it to the start...and woke up.

i have my theories, but can anyone out there interpret this dream...?

please stop rubbing your microphone against your jacket, mr. burns...

finally, the president of the united states has shown up for the debates. it's too bad it was during the debate between vice presidential candidates. yes, dick cheney is that de facto commander-in-chief. this guy was slick, in command of the subject at hand. i could see dick cheney in the backrooms pulling the strings. it's not hard to see him as the driving force behind the iraqi war.

as for the debate, it thought dick cheney's arguments regarding the invasion of iraq were fundamentally flawed, perceive or otherwise, by the fact that he was once the ceo of haliburton, the company that received the single largest uncontested contract to rebuild iraq. money talks (i'm such a skeptic). secondarily, he continued to reiterate the al-qaeda/saddam hussein link. what's with that? if i was an american, i'd think either he was a liar or totally deluded. he believed the cia intelligence before the war but not now? i thought edwards just hammered the "president" on haliburton, saddam, and telling the truth on what's really going on in iraq... that was fun to watch.

as the incumbent, i'd expected dick cheney to defend the record of the current administration. he preferred to attack john edwards' attendance record in senate committees. what's with that? who cares?

i thought john edwards did quite well. not bad considering he was going up against the leader of the free world. he did better than john kerry, by the way. as an opponent, i expected him to point out inconsistencies, deficiencies, hypocrisies of dubya's administration. he came out and did just that, coming up with zingers all night long. for example, in fight against AIDS he said it was good to increase education and research but linked it to the fact that over 5 million americans lost their medical insurance last year alone and have no way of affording AIDS drugs.

moreover, edwards offered to the viewers alternative plans. i think that's what the undecided voter is after. dick had nothing really to offer other than the status quo both in iraq and domestic policy. i don't think the world can take another 4 years with out imploding...

i thought tonight was way more entertaining than the 1st presidential debate. the contestants were much more articulate. the zingers were flying left and right all night long. bring on the buffoons for another round on friday night.

someone please squeegee my head...

in my quest for adequate fitness, i went for bike ride up to the airport on monday. man, it was a beautiful day. really hot. well, relatively hot (24 C). the airport is a marathon away from home in sundance. considering my flabbiness, the trip up was ok. it took 2 hours. had a little snack while scoping out airplanes in the main waiting area. i need a snack or i'll just hit the wall on the way back. it's happened before. it's not a pleasant feeling...

took a bit less than 2 hrs on the way back. instead of following the bow river, i detoured onto the WID canal path. they've shut off the diversion from the bow. so, the canal was in fact a giant elongated slough. ducks and geese were having their fill. how the hell can they suck up that scum off the bottom?

anyways, i make it home just as the sun went down. my knees locked up in the garage and i staggered into the house. before anything else, i hit the bathroom to wash off the bug kill on the top of my head.

did i mention the flocks of bugs out there. they're annoying. i usually suck in, accidently, alot of bugs. surprisingly, they have no taste to them. once in a while a bug would land in my mouth and my tongue would go numb for an instant. cool...

i had supper in front of the tv. the cbc was showing LOTR 1. LOTR gets better everytime i watch it. the special effects and overall craftsman were even more fantastic this time. good on cbc for showing it.

the dilemma of the night came at 9 PM. LOTR was building mo' for a blockbuster end. then NBC had the gall to put on an all women's fear factor. what is a guy to do?

dude, johnny thrash sucks...



the liberry now has dvd's for public loan!!! ok, they aren't the current releases you'll find at your local video store but there are the occasional jewel on the liberry rack. for instance, i came across "ski bums". ok, i would normally overlook this title at the store but hell it was free and surprisingly good.

filmed in whistler BC, the documentary was loaded with spectacular, sorry that's gnarly, clips of out-of-bounds skiing, heli-skiing, and ski mountaineering. but i thought the most interesting aspect of the show was the cameras following the rather motley group of ski bums during their "off" time; their constant struggle to live the "lifestyle".

just seeing that title on the shelf conjured up visions of slackers in my head. and, to be fair, each and every "character" was a slacker. each have a nickname and a story to tell. here are just a few.

crucial mike: a 40-50 year old ski bum who i'd call a definitive wasta. a complete wasta who resembles grizzly adams. to save money, he scavenges rich folk leftovers in the lodge cafeteria. towards the end of the film he moved out of his van and rented a dilapidated shack. this way he could entertain the "ladies". hilarious.

punchy: a really cute snowboarding wasta in her 20's. to get by, she works as a go-go dancer in a whistler bar. her priorities in life? the next meal and a ski pass. not necessarily in that order! hilarious. i forgot to mention that she loved to punch people.

johnny thrash: the wildest guy in the show. thrash was clearly an psychotic exhibitionist. there were numerous clips of him in the buff hanging off various architectural structures in bars and while skiing. his greatest accomplishment was rolling down main street naked while strapped in a gyro-sphere. part of the punishment was writing a letter of apology to the mayor. in disgust he said, "the mayor didn't even see [me in the gyro machine]". he greatest revelation came when he confessed that excessive easy sex is over-hyped when it came to ski bums citing that the chicks just don't dig smelly guys in dirty clothes. dudes, can he ski though. by the way, he loves the "wacky". hilarious.

the common threads amongst the characters were their love of skiing and the lifestyle that comes with it. they live for the moment and the feeling of freedom they get from skiing. they're realistic about they're sport particularly when faced with inherent dangers such as avalanches. instead of backing off when someone dies, they are driven even more to find the next perfect run.

it's not often people get to do what they want to do in life. i can identify with living for the moment and the feeling of freedom that comes with traveling. it's absolutely addictive. try it.

it struck me as watched the film that i'm a bum. i am doomed.

do yourself a favour and rent or sign out "ski bums" from the liberry.

rating: 5 overdue fines out of 5.