ladies and gentlemen, please assume the position...

hot off the press!

disclaimer: bigtubofgoo inc. does not take reponsibility for any injuries, physical or psychological, that may occur by assuming the bodily contortion that the following statement advocates. please do not attempt this physical configuration at home unless under the supervision of trained aviation experts or advisement of a physician.




WestJet Asks Guests to Assist in Realizing Fuel Efficiencies

MAR 31, 2006 - 11:00 ET

CALGARY, ALBERTA--(CCNMatthews - March 31, 2006) - WestJet announced today that it will be launching a new program where guests can assist the airline in realizing fuel efficiencies.

"Our Blended Winglet Technology has allowed us to reap the benefits of improved fuel efficiency," said Richard Bartrem, WestJet's Director Brand and Communications. "Knowing this, we commissioned a number of studies to determine how this principle could be applied inside the aircraft with our guests. The results were conclusively positive; the combination of specific hand and arm positions of our guests has a direct impact on our fuel efficiency.

"Beginning tomorrow, we ask that every guest aboard a WestJet aircraft assume the inflight winglet position upon takeoff," says Bartrem. "This involves straightening the arms at a ninety-degree angle to the side of the body, holding the fingers together, and positioning the hand at a ninety-degree angle upward. For more information, visit westjet.com and click on the 'Blended Winglets' banner."

The airline is confident the increased roominess of their Boeing Next-Generation 737 aircraft will ensure all guests are able to fully participate in this cost-saving measure.

Marking its tenth anniversary this year, WestJet is Canada's leading low-fare airline offering scheduled service throughout its 33-city North American network. Named Canada's most respected corporation for customer service in 2005, WestJet pioneered low-cost high-value flying in Canada. With increased legroom and leather seats on its modern fleet of Boeing Next-Generation 737 aircraft, and live seatback television provided by Bell ExpressVu on the majority of its fleet, WestJet strives to be the number one choice for travellers.

FOR FURTHER INFORMATION PLEASE CONTACT:
WestJet
Media Relations
Gillian Bentley
(403) 444-2615
Website: www.westjet.com

have a nice day...

hodge podge...

total eclipse of the sun.

so, did y'all catch the eclipse yesterday? don't worry, it may as well have been a million miles away unless you were in the saharan desert.



i'd like to see an eclipse before i croak. so, i did a bit of research. if i were to do it on the cheap, i'd have wait till 2017, according to the above map. it's suppose to soar right over my sister's house in portland.

i feel a road trip comin' on my friends, if i'm still alive in 2017.

either that or we'll all observe it over calgary in 2044 while gathered around my death bed.

earth day quiz

hmmm...time for another internet quiz. according to the folks at Earth Day headquarters, if everyone on the planet lived like little ol' me, it would take 4.2 earths to support our lifestyles.

click here for your own eco-foot print.

predictions...

life for palestinians ain't gonna get any better under the new israeli regime. i thought they were going to set the permanent israeli borders after talking with their partners in peace. man, was i dumb.

based on darryl sutter's theory of dividing the last 28 games of the regular NHL season into 4 series of 7 games thus simulating the number of series required to win the stanley cup...i predict the calgary flames will bow out of the 2006 NHL playoffs in the second round.

hotel rwanda.

mega depressing yet powerful movie. genocide is pretty nasty. rwandan massacre hits a little close to home. i was in tanzania when it happened. what the hell was i doing? i knew about it before i left canada. i was probably doing something stupid like being on safari or something.

i'd like to visit rwanda someday. i've read travellers' accounts. the border guards are supposed to be really cranky. no one talks about 1994. who can blame them?

anyway, excellent film. i was blubbering pretty good at the end of it.

mystery #47

mystery photo #47. clue: clothing accessory.

lots of movies.

Aviator

beautifully shot movie. whenever i read a review and the first thing mentioned is the cinematography you wonder about the story. well, in the case of aviator, there was a story, albeit one with gaping holes.

when i was growing up, there were 2 words synonymous with howard hughes in news stories: recluse and eccentric. so, the screenwriter's of aviator had alot of latitude. it was interesting playing armchair psychologist. hughes definitely had a wild case of obsessive compulsive disorder, eh. i thought he was a paranoid schizophrenic as well. but, what's with these toilet paper all over the place, clothes burning, and peeing in milk bottles behaviours? i kind of got tired at the end trying to figure out what's wrong with this guy.

at the end of the day, leonardo di caprio protrayal of a driven, crazy guy was superior. an accurate portrayal? i dunno.

go to the bathroom beforehand. this movie must have been 3 hrs. long.

Red Eye

continuing on the aviation theme... red eye is movie i consider to be standard fare. a few thrilling moments. rachel mcadams was good. the creepy guy, who appeared in batman returns, who terrorized mcadams was extra creepy. i think it's his weird eyes. an abrupt plot twist, where the creepy guy reveals the true intent of his character, and the airline setting were amongst some pausibility issues. however, if you can handle these cracks (not difficult), this was an entertaining, standard, hollywood film.

i'm thinking of starting a rachel mcadam's film fest, however short it maybe...

(the) School of Rock

while i was deconstructing this film with my friend bob, when i realized school of rock was in fact a knock off of the classic 1965 film sound of music. consider these modifications: substitute rogers and hammerstein with led zeppelin and ACDC; jack black for julie andrews; maria being kicked out of the nunnery with jack being booted out of his band; andrews teaching the kids how to write a song with doh, rei, mi with jack teaching kids rock music with antisocial attitude; the nazis with parents/teachers; the final escape of the von trapps after the salzburg sing fest with the school of rock sneaking off on a ultra secret "field trip" to the battle of the bands concert, and you have movies that are mirror images of one another...

how's that for film analysis?

bottomline: this was one of the funniest movies i've seen in along time. jack black was hilarious. his corruption of this elementary class with rock and roll was hilarious. normally, i'm nauseated by movies with snotty-nosed precocious kids but the kids in school of rock rocked. very good casting.

happy early winter solstice...

i snapped a few pix while running the other day. looks like churches are really diversifying their congregations nowadays...

scarlett johannson film fest part 4...

finally got through in good company...

i thought it was one of the most disturbing films i've seen in a long time. i think it had alot to do with that 70's show guy. he was just plain irritating. my primary thought through the whole movie was 'when is dennis quaid, or someone else, going to wack this guy?'

does that mean the 70's show guy did a terrific job at playing a snivelling, bottomline driven, buzzword using, sychophantic middle manager? maybe.

if an actor elicits the appropriate response from his/her audience, does that mean they have done a good job? i dunno.

to use another example, i thought ralph fiennes gave a stellar performance as the concentration camp commandante in schindler's list. it was so creepy. damn, he was a fine actor.

i didn't feel the same way about the 70's show guy - no matter how hard i tried.

i thought dennis quaid did a credible job.

scarlett johannson was once again hot. she played tennis...

she needs to find more expansive roles like she had in lost in translation...

man, this was a confusing review.

bonus review...

i saw ray, the ray charles bio pic, yesterday. it's taken me a while to see it. i should've seen it on the big screen.

suffice to say, ray charles was a genius and jamie foxx was a genius in playing him. in fact, it was one of the most incredible performance i've seen in recent memory. i hope he won some acting awards for his efforts.

it was a really really long movie. a couple of hours at least. i dunno. it was just chocked full of great music. i just knew him through his music before. but, man, the big time womanising, the heroin use, made him a real character, like it or not.

if you haven't seen it, don't delay.

news item...

a guy in afghanistan is being tried for the crime of converting from islam to christianity. according to shariah law in that country, he's subject to execution if found guilty.

to add insult to injury, under pressure from infidel western governments, the afghans might throw out the case by pronouncing the convert to be insane. ha!

well, i should been a christian a long time ago, if insanity was a pre-requisite.

in a related story, pm stephen harper phoned afghan pm hamid karzai to plead the convert's case and allow him to "cross the floor". ha!

a girl, a pair of pearl earrings, a bag of chips.

bubba: uh, soapydave, what you think of this earring movie? dave: dunno, couldn't hear it over your snoring...

the scarlett johansson film fest rolled into 17th century Holland on the back of a leaky, slow boat of a flick called girl with pearl earrings.

essentially, girl with pearl earrings was about a painting by the same name and how it came to be.

the movie opened with griet, a very young flemish house maid, entering the household of malcontents led by the extremely unprolific Dutch master painter johannes vermeer (played by colin firth). griet's days were filled with the menial of tasks and dealing with vermeer's psychotic family: his wacky paranoid wife, mother-in-law-from-hell, and evil daughter cornelia who reminds me of the kid in deliverance.

eventually, she was assigned to clean vermeer's top secret studio. she and vermeer forged a relationship. one thing led to another. you'd think they be ripping each other's clothes off at some point in time. no! (lost in translation de ja vu music please).

vermeer recognized talent when he saw it. if this poor illiterate girl wasn't a slave, she'd be a great artist like me!! yes!! those clouds aren't just white. they're yellow with shades of grey. nothing's just black and white, eh. i'm not sure if this relationship blossomed or not.

vermeer was a great artist. that's all he wanted to do was paint. he had bills to pay and a wretched family to take care of. to do this he had to deal with his one and only wealthy patron, a boorish, perverted mr. van ruijven. with less than honourable intentions, van ruijven commissioned vermeer to paint his lovely assistant griet, under the nose of the paranoid mrs. vermeer.

it took a monumental effort to watch this movie to completion. lost in translation was a suspense thriller complete with car chases compared to earrings.

in terms of plot, scarlett, who gave a magnificent performance, just didn't have enough to work with. besides scrubbing floors and floating in and out her master's studio, she seemed lost most of the time.

she posed alot. that was good.

i didn't care for the supporting characters. there was nothing to like about them. they were just a nasty bunch.

the relationship between vermeer and griet just didn't seem to develop properly. i mean it didn't seem plausible. i don't think they were even friendly. vermeer seemed like a mouse compared to greit. i sensed no sizzle...not even steak. i'm sorry. it was just awkward. really.

so many contradictions... so little time.

i'm tempted to watch this movie again. then maybe not...

for now, i'm happy to report that scarlett was still quite hot. i liked that bonnet she was wearing.

rating: 5 scarlett's outta 5. for the movie: 4 snooze button hits outta 5.

next: in good company.

same crap, different day...

name that tune...

this morning i heard one of the greatest lines to open a song:

"i've got a good mind to give up livin' and go shopping instead..."

that was hot...

can you guess who the artist is and the name of the tune? answer in the comments.

the rrrrrrrrroll-up-the-rrrrrrrrrim supreme court makes a landmark decision...

LB (little boy) and his sister, LG (little girl) were over on saturday for a lil' snack. the tim horton's (the iconic doughnut franchisor) debacle in the province of quebec was on our brains.

for out-of-towners, read this article...

well, in a vote of 3 to 0, we, the justices of rrrrrim rrrrrolling, decided "finders keepers....losers weepers".

so, drop the DNA testing and hand over the keys to the first girl...pronto.

the film festival continues...

i watched lost in translation last night as part of my on-going scarlett johansson film festival.

i'm sure many of my loyal readers have already seen this movie. i'll just get to the heart of the matter.

scarlett johansson was pretty hot.

but, what about bob? i thought bill murray was outstanding in his role as "bob harris", consummate american actor. i'll rank bill's role up there with his effort in groundhog day (one of my most favourite movies of all time). there were plenty of chances for bill's zany comic ability to manifest itself. watching the hospital scene in lost, i was on the edge of my seat, thinkin' "bill's going to bust this thing open any second now." but he kept it real (in character) and delivered an excellent, understated (for bill), but brilliant and precise performance.

normally, i skip movies like lost in translation. heavy on relationships and slow. well, the movie was just that. however, the evolution of an unlikely relationship between two seemingly lonely souls was captivating. they developed a friendship that seems to be missing with their own spousal relationships. there was sizzle between them alright. you'd think they'd hook up. yes!! but, at an emotional, intellectual level. that, my friends, was fascinating...yet refreshing.

that movie wasn't slow at all. in fact, the tension between the characters fueled the pace like high octane gas injected into a hot hemi engine.

i was sad at the end...

about scarlett, she was hot. it's good to know she's interested in older men. well, cinematically speaking, i guess.

so far, she's played a got-it-together girl in ghost world. then she played the completely clueless clone in the island. now, i've seen her playing a confused, not-so-got-it-together girl. i need to see her cry.

rating: 5 scarlett's out of 5.

next movie in the film festival: girl with a pearl earring...

mystery #46

mystery #46: an easy one...
not much happening other than to remind all conan o'brien fans of the his finland special tonite. so, get the vcr hooked up. should be a classic, eh...

mystery #44 or having fun with google earth...

mystery #44: just to the right of centre is a large asian public space. it appears as white in colour. 3 questions: 1) what is the name of this square? 2) what is the building in the southern half of the square...? clue: beach volleyball.

quotable quotes.

just some interesting quotes in the news that grabbed my attention the last few days...

too much mexican wacky tobacky and tequila...

the RCMP held a news conference with regards to those 2 canadians who were murdered in a hotel in cancun. a RCMP spokesperson defended his mexican colleagues and the integrity of their investigation. according to him, "We have full confidence in the Mexican police and in their ability to carry out this investigation in a proper fashion..."

that's hilarious. man, i got some swamp land to sell, if the Gravel Road Cops are interested. the mexican cops must be besides themselves. man, those gringos are so gullible, eh? i nearly busted a rib laughing the first time i heard this. haha...

shut up ralphie...just shut up...

"I don't need this crap," said ralphie, in response to the opposition liberals' alternatives to his "third way" plan for healthcare in alberta.

immediately thereafter, he threw a yellow pages-sized copy of the opposition document at the messenger, a 17 year old female legislative page, in a fit of uncontrollable rage...

critics have likened this assault to ralphie throwing a cream pie. c'mon, give the guy a break. he was having a bad day. he is NOT losing it. he has no previous history of this kind of rash, objectionable behaviour.

ok, i forgot there was that time where he, in a drunken stupor, threw money at poor people in a homeless shelter. ok, that was pretty bad. but, c'mon give the guy a break.

i gonna miss that guy when he hangs it up...

shoes on the other foot, inshallah...

i was watching news the other night on the cbc when they had an article on the stoppage of canadian aid money to the palestinian projects because of the election of hamas, a terrorist organization, as the new palestinian government (long sentence, eh?).

apparently, we as canadians, fund alot of feel good projects in palestine. educational funding that keep kids off the streets and give them hope for the future.

when confronted about this termination of canadian funding, a palestinian teacher said, "why should canada judge our nation by the government we elect..." i couldn't believe my ears. i did a double take. wahoo!!! the shoe's on the other foot.

i dislike it when islamists lump us "westerners" in with terrorist goverments like dubya's. i have nothing to do with the US government. yet, i'm identified with it and am subject to terrorist threats like 9/11. i bet those two canadian hostages in baghdad would have been really pissed off after hearing that comment. or, would they?

upon second thought, maybe it'd be a more peaceful world if we just accept people for who they are. live and let live... only if we can talk above our governments...